My ex just finished boot camp and is stationed somewhere in Mississippi. I don%26#039;t have any details on his status because he doesn%26#039;t include me on any of this. We have a daughter (I have cared for solely since age 2). He hasn%26#039;t seen her since several months prior to boot camp. He is ordered to pay child support, which he does and to carry insurance on her, which he never has.
Last week I got a letter from social services stating that I needed to enroll my daughter in DEERS in order to get her military insurance and ID cards. I called the number provided but basically got no answers. They%26#039;re telling me that everything has to be done on his end. I%26#039;m fairly certain that he has her listed as a dependant (they say he gets paid more if he does that, even if the child%26#039;s not in his custody). What I don%26#039;t know is whether or not there is anything I can do to get her into DEERS. I seem to be getting so much contradictory info. I have no way to contact him. Please help...
Navy families, please answer...?
Hope I can help, JES. Your first task is to find out where your ex is stationed. You must talk to him and let him know that you need help getting HIS daughter an ID card so that she can get the Navy support that she (and you in some cases) are entitled to. He must initiate some of the action. Medical care is one of those entitlements. You might start by talking to a Navy recruiter in your area. He or she might be able to give you guidance or materials that would help you locate your ex and assist with your problem. If not, go to any Navy establishment near where you live, get a visitor%26#039;s pass and go to Navy Admin or the chaplain%26#039;s office and ask them to help. If none of those avenues gets you any results, contact one of your elected federal official%26#039;s office for his or her help. Keep sort of a diary of what you do as you go including phone numbers, names of offices and personnel that you talk to and the times and dates of those duscussions. If the situation stretches in to a prolonged endeavor, the info you have collected will come in very handy. Let%26#039;s hope that your ex will give you a call so you can get him started on his obligations. You might check with his parents to see if they have been contacted or if the Navy has told them where he was transferred to. Good luck.
Reply:Well, first he is paying support. So that%26#039;s good.
Second, he must place his child on Deers. There is a means for you to do this, however you would have to have a birth certificate showing he is the father first. Forcing him to place the child on Deers will require a degree of effort as so many others mentioned. Like knowing where he is.
Yes, if he accepts the child as his own, the process is smooth and easy. Contact him should help you to idenfity his priorities. It%26#039;s sad, that you only seem to wish to contact him to ask him about something he can do. I mean, you could have tried to reach him earlier to send him some pics once in a while. Since he is sending support, you might want to identify where he is from these payments.
No Meridian is not the only base in Mississippi. Yes you can locate him.
You must identify yourself as calling on the behalf of a service members child/dependent. If you do not feel comfortable stating this, then you can make arrangements to pay a $3.50 fee for the service and mailing to the address provided on the call:
1-866-827-5672
Fax: (901) 874-2000
Fax DSN: 882-2000
You%26#039;ll need to know his full name, age (birth date is helpful), and of course, the SSN is best (but not required). While you may think he%26#039;s in Mississippi, he may only be assigned their and deployed elsewhere. You will only be given a command name and address from there you will have to search more.
Reply:If he%26#039;s Navy he is in a training school at Naval Air Station, Meridian, Mississippi. He has to make out an application for her ID to get her entered into DEERS. If there is an order for him to provide child support, that can be set up through an allotment where the amount is deducted from his pay and sent to you.
My advice is to go to a Navy recruiter in your home town. Th at individual should be able to find out which Navy training school he is attending at Meridian, the phone numbers for that school%26#039;s commanding officer, etc.
Reply:If he is getting paid more, then she is already in DEERS. as such, she already has TRICARE Standard.
That being said: with a court order, he is required to enroll her in DEERS and provide her with an ID since he does not have custody( children do not get an ID until the age of ten otherwise).
I%26#039;d lay odds he is in A school in Missipppi, Prolly NAS Meridian. since you have a court order, contact the base and ask who you need to speak with. They will require him to do all the necessary paperwork at his end and mail it to you, and you can go to any nearby installation to get her ID and enroll her into TRICARE Prime.
there is no cost for that, btw, but he will ALSO be required to enroll her into Dental, and there is a cost($11/month) for that
Reply:Find out who his command is and get a hold of the ombundsmen (the dependant liason to his commanding officer) and let them know your intentions. They should be more than happy to help.
Reply:he doesnt get paid more if he doesnt have custody of her unless he lied about it, the only extra pay for having dependents is the increased dependent rate BAH which he doesnt qualify for if he doesnt have custody of her. he may be getting what they call BAQ differential...which your already getting your share of through his child support thats what that money is for. as far as enrolling her in DEERS your gonna have to find out where he is and contact his command.....or let the court know that it hasnt been done and let them deal with it.
treatment
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Help,should I put my daughter in juvenile or boot camp?
Ok,here it is.I have two daughters ages 12 and 8.And I love them very much!But they are driving me crazy!My oldest is so damn mouthy!She tortures me.I do not hit her.And I try hard not to argue with either of them.I know that I am the mother!And people tell me to just beat her ***!But unfortunately,today you can Not do that.Or else the children%26#039;s bureau will get involved.Been there done that!For teaching my kids violence.I know in the good old days,and in the bible.It was and spare the rod and spoil the child.Well,it certainly is NOT that way today.And I also do not believe in beatings.Both my husband and I were raised that way.And it didn%26#039;t change the way we acted.We rebelled.I am gonna start grounding my oldest,and sticking to it!Does anyone else discipline their children this way?And if so did it work for you?My main reason for this question,is to get ideas of ways to discipline and communicate with my almost 13 yr old.I consider myself a good mother.Although,%26gt;
Help,should I put my daughter in juvenile or boot camp?
First of all you must have definite rules about what is acceptable and what is not in your house. Put it in writing. 12 yr olds should not have a broad range of choices in anything--they are still children. These children are looking for boundaries and they don%26#039;t feel they have them. Will they yell and scream--yes, for a while until they know the rules are the rules. Every rule MUST have a consequence for violating it. If you have to take away the cell phone (a 12 yr old does not need one except for emergencies), and the computer (except when you sit with her for homework), her TV, her radio, her CDs, etc. so be it. She can lose it all--she won%26#039;t die. She has to have supervision about where she goes, what she watches and listens to, who she hangs with. To regain control, you will have to take drastic measures---and stick with them until she earns priviledges back--through respect and following the rules.
Now if she gets mouthy stop talking to her. Say to her %26quot;When you can calm down and talk like a young lady I will discuss . . . . . . with you and not until then. If you continue this behavior you will lose . . . or you may not go. . . or you will remain in this house. . . etc%26quot; Hopefully you get the picture.
Until she straightens out and flies right--she should have a strongly structured environment and have her teachers at school and other adults around her follow through as well. Communicate with them and let them know the plan.
There are ways to bring her back. . . Among the suggestions I like are in Dave Ramsey%26#039;s book, Financial Peace. He suggests paying preteens and teenagers a commission (not allowance) for specific chores around the house that they could be responsible for. . making their beds, keeping their room clean, helping with laundry, cleaning, etc. When they follow through pay them an appropriate commission ($ 1.00 a week for making their bed daily, $ 1.00 a week for keeping their room clean, etc.) That way they build up their self-esteem (which this girl does not have), their responsibility level, and their emotional control, because if they choose not to do their choices they don%26#039;t earn their commission.
I could go on and on, but I think you probably get the drift. . . and yes, we discipline our grandkids (and formerly our children) that way.
Reply:They sound like they%26#039;re acting their ages, to tell you the truth. Yes, it%26#039;s hard. It%26#039;s parenting. It would be WAAYYY overboard to put them in boot camp. Especially at their ages.
Reply:many schools offer such things a boot camps or something like them...school system pays for it and everything...here we have a nature camp the kids are sent to, my friends son just went, they are gone for a year minium. talk to the school counselors.
Reply:well there used to be expensive boarding schools for this type of thing ( i have been myself)....but the one i went to closed down. try outward bound for real life experience. i think CEdu is still around (School in LA) there are also other branches off Cedu that do the same thing.
OR heck - put them in their place and if CPS comes and takes them, they will learn how much they want to be with YOU after floating around in foster homes.
Reply:first i have to tell you that there is no law against spanking your child and there is a difference between spanking and beating, no you should beat your child but you should spank them, ground them, take all there personal belongings away and make them stay in there room no matter what or make them spend every spare moment of there life with you, if they want things in life then they have to work for them, as far as being good that is.
Reply:She%26#039;s growing up, seems a little more rebellious than most but it is normal I guess. You may want to look into military school where if she does that they will go insane.
Most likely as they get older, especially the older one, will realize what they are doing and stop. But its your decesion.
Reply:wow..sounds bad! well i am 12 going on 13 too...and im a ***** to my mother. Its just because during that age we feel like cellphones-computers-and friends are the most important things ever. Ur kinda like my mom when she grounds me it never sticks...well shes just doing it cause for some reason during that age we really dont want our mother in out life...idk why..but we just do. i think the best thing is to just get away from her for a lil bit...like one day make an appointment at a salon/spa or somthing have them do ur nails/hair and everything relax a little send her to a friends or somthing for a little bit..just back off her case..try to be as kind as u can...i really wish i could talk to ur daughter....but yeah i think you should do what i said
Hope i Helped (dont give away custody!!!!!)
Good luck
Reply:I%26#039;m sorry... maybe it%26#039;s their school and or babysitter. Maybe it%26#039;s their friends. Maybe you don;t pay enough attention to them so they seek it out anyway they can by bad mouthing, rebelling, etc... I know because I was a neglected teenager once. Try spending more time with each girl individually. Just have a girl%26#039;s night of fun and talk... Like a sleep over. I think you might have to reconnect with them. Focus on what you are doing wrong as a parent first. Then proceed to fix yourself prior to trying to fix a problem that really isn%26#039;t as bad as you think. Juvy and boot camp is more for kids who are frequently breaking the law and getting into drugs, prostitution, shop lifting. I know if I were in your daughter%26#039;s shoes that would just frustrate me even more. Let your daughters know every single day how much you love them. Children are precious... Reconsider yourself, then you can fix what%26#039;s going on.
Reply:You should defiantly ground her and stick with it. It sounds to me like you have been lack in discipline up until now, when things are getting out of control. Start making and enforcing rules, with your younger daughter as well. You don%26#039;t have to hit to correct your children. Just be firm and consist ant. Make rules, explain the rules, enforce the rules. When you ground your children, strictly enforce it, don%26#039;t allow them to watch TV, or talk on the phone. It%26#039;s not always easy, but it has to be done.
Reply:Space bar. Please use it in the future to separate sentences.
And to answer your question, I think they%26#039;d resent you if you did that. I think you should go to a family therapist instead.
Reply:It seems that when a preteen mouths off, it might be because she doesn%26#039;t think she will be heard otherwise. It will take some time to catch on, but let her know you will be more than willing to listen to her if she speaks to you respectfully. Give her chances to give her opinion and on the things that are not of great consquence, give in. Teenagers are often like toddlers, you have to offer them choices and pick your battles.
Reply:what exactly do they do that pisses you off so much? if they get in trouble with the law don%26#039;t bail them out let them go juvi could be a good wake up call for them
Camel
Help,should I put my daughter in juvenile or boot camp?
First of all you must have definite rules about what is acceptable and what is not in your house. Put it in writing. 12 yr olds should not have a broad range of choices in anything--they are still children. These children are looking for boundaries and they don%26#039;t feel they have them. Will they yell and scream--yes, for a while until they know the rules are the rules. Every rule MUST have a consequence for violating it. If you have to take away the cell phone (a 12 yr old does not need one except for emergencies), and the computer (except when you sit with her for homework), her TV, her radio, her CDs, etc. so be it. She can lose it all--she won%26#039;t die. She has to have supervision about where she goes, what she watches and listens to, who she hangs with. To regain control, you will have to take drastic measures---and stick with them until she earns priviledges back--through respect and following the rules.
Now if she gets mouthy stop talking to her. Say to her %26quot;When you can calm down and talk like a young lady I will discuss . . . . . . with you and not until then. If you continue this behavior you will lose . . . or you may not go. . . or you will remain in this house. . . etc%26quot; Hopefully you get the picture.
Until she straightens out and flies right--she should have a strongly structured environment and have her teachers at school and other adults around her follow through as well. Communicate with them and let them know the plan.
There are ways to bring her back. . . Among the suggestions I like are in Dave Ramsey%26#039;s book, Financial Peace. He suggests paying preteens and teenagers a commission (not allowance) for specific chores around the house that they could be responsible for. . making their beds, keeping their room clean, helping with laundry, cleaning, etc. When they follow through pay them an appropriate commission ($ 1.00 a week for making their bed daily, $ 1.00 a week for keeping their room clean, etc.) That way they build up their self-esteem (which this girl does not have), their responsibility level, and their emotional control, because if they choose not to do their choices they don%26#039;t earn their commission.
I could go on and on, but I think you probably get the drift. . . and yes, we discipline our grandkids (and formerly our children) that way.
Reply:They sound like they%26#039;re acting their ages, to tell you the truth. Yes, it%26#039;s hard. It%26#039;s parenting. It would be WAAYYY overboard to put them in boot camp. Especially at their ages.
Reply:many schools offer such things a boot camps or something like them...school system pays for it and everything...here we have a nature camp the kids are sent to, my friends son just went, they are gone for a year minium. talk to the school counselors.
Reply:well there used to be expensive boarding schools for this type of thing ( i have been myself)....but the one i went to closed down. try outward bound for real life experience. i think CEdu is still around (School in LA) there are also other branches off Cedu that do the same thing.
OR heck - put them in their place and if CPS comes and takes them, they will learn how much they want to be with YOU after floating around in foster homes.
Reply:first i have to tell you that there is no law against spanking your child and there is a difference between spanking and beating, no you should beat your child but you should spank them, ground them, take all there personal belongings away and make them stay in there room no matter what or make them spend every spare moment of there life with you, if they want things in life then they have to work for them, as far as being good that is.
Reply:She%26#039;s growing up, seems a little more rebellious than most but it is normal I guess. You may want to look into military school where if she does that they will go insane.
Most likely as they get older, especially the older one, will realize what they are doing and stop. But its your decesion.
Reply:wow..sounds bad! well i am 12 going on 13 too...and im a ***** to my mother. Its just because during that age we feel like cellphones-computers-and friends are the most important things ever. Ur kinda like my mom when she grounds me it never sticks...well shes just doing it cause for some reason during that age we really dont want our mother in out life...idk why..but we just do. i think the best thing is to just get away from her for a lil bit...like one day make an appointment at a salon/spa or somthing have them do ur nails/hair and everything relax a little send her to a friends or somthing for a little bit..just back off her case..try to be as kind as u can...i really wish i could talk to ur daughter....but yeah i think you should do what i said
Hope i Helped (dont give away custody!!!!!)
Good luck
Reply:I%26#039;m sorry... maybe it%26#039;s their school and or babysitter. Maybe it%26#039;s their friends. Maybe you don;t pay enough attention to them so they seek it out anyway they can by bad mouthing, rebelling, etc... I know because I was a neglected teenager once. Try spending more time with each girl individually. Just have a girl%26#039;s night of fun and talk... Like a sleep over. I think you might have to reconnect with them. Focus on what you are doing wrong as a parent first. Then proceed to fix yourself prior to trying to fix a problem that really isn%26#039;t as bad as you think. Juvy and boot camp is more for kids who are frequently breaking the law and getting into drugs, prostitution, shop lifting. I know if I were in your daughter%26#039;s shoes that would just frustrate me even more. Let your daughters know every single day how much you love them. Children are precious... Reconsider yourself, then you can fix what%26#039;s going on.
Reply:You should defiantly ground her and stick with it. It sounds to me like you have been lack in discipline up until now, when things are getting out of control. Start making and enforcing rules, with your younger daughter as well. You don%26#039;t have to hit to correct your children. Just be firm and consist ant. Make rules, explain the rules, enforce the rules. When you ground your children, strictly enforce it, don%26#039;t allow them to watch TV, or talk on the phone. It%26#039;s not always easy, but it has to be done.
Reply:Space bar. Please use it in the future to separate sentences.
And to answer your question, I think they%26#039;d resent you if you did that. I think you should go to a family therapist instead.
Reply:It seems that when a preteen mouths off, it might be because she doesn%26#039;t think she will be heard otherwise. It will take some time to catch on, but let her know you will be more than willing to listen to her if she speaks to you respectfully. Give her chances to give her opinion and on the things that are not of great consquence, give in. Teenagers are often like toddlers, you have to offer them choices and pick your battles.
Reply:what exactly do they do that pisses you off so much? if they get in trouble with the law don%26#039;t bail them out let them go juvi could be a good wake up call for them
Camel
How do I boot my "husband"?
I want my common law husband out of my life, well at least my everyday life. We have two young children, and I made a serious mistake by letting him moving in with me 3 years ago just because I was pregnant. I really didn%26#039;t want to be with him and now I seriously regret it! He%26#039;s not the kind of person I want to be with. He%26#039;s just too childish. I%26#039;m trying to better my children%26#039;s lives and he just holds us down. The problem is that I have told him several times to leave but I always back down. I want him to understand that we can be friends and work together for the kids%26#039; sake, but I am just not happy with him. FYI, I am so unhappy because 1.) he doesn%26#039;t work 1/2 the time, 2.) he smokes, 3.) he cusses in front of my kids, 4.) he calls me names and yells at me all the time, %26amp; 5.) he has a serious temper problem.
How do I boot my %26quot;husband%26quot;?
I would write him a letter telling him how you feel and if he scoffs at it- too bad. You dont desearve to be treated like that- you desearve so much better. And if he refused to move out, know that you can file a resraining order. Name calling is verbal abuse and if his bad temper makes you fear for your safety- there will be no question as to whether they will grant it to you or not. But that is only for the exstreme
Hope this is help
Reply:I agree with you, he needs booted. Tell him you want something different, but no one but you can make you stick to your guns. If it were me, I would tell him that you need to see him take on more responsibility outside your home. That he needs to become self-sufficient on his own and then you can consider getting back together.
These types of men find change very difficult because someone is always bailing them out. Your right, he needs to grow up and even though you don%26#039;t want to be his mother, that is exactly what you have become. Your children will even suffer, it is their turn to be the kid, he had his chance.
Maybe he will seek counsel, but don%26#039;t be surprised if he doesn%26#039;t.
Reply:next time he leaves the house, change the locks..
Reply:id make him leave your kid%26#039;s should come first and they pick up cussing and he won%26#039;t work and help you and you did everything like a wife would do
Reply:Well, the bad news. It will not get better. Once a person starts with any kind of abuse, verbal, physical, psychological...it just gets easier. You HAVE to get him to leave before the time comes when you are so in his power you are helpless to evict him. Believe me it happens in abusive relationships. You get afraid for the children as well as yourself. Do it NOW! Good luck!
Reply:check eviction laws in your state.
In TX you could give him a letter giving him 3 days notice to move if there is no lease or written rental agreement.
If he%26#039;d abusive, you can call the cops, have him hauled off and get a restraining order. He%26#039;d be gone and subject to jail for returning. (works in just about any state)
There should be a local legal aid group you can ask how to take care of your specific situation.
Reply:You need to kick him out for your childrens sake. This man is a giant loser and a very bad role model for them.
Reply:so how about u just ask him nicely to leave and do not back up? if he doesn%26#039;t leave u always can inform the police if he doesn%26#039;t live there legally. but if he does u will need to move out with your kids yourself. too bad, next time u think twice before u let somebody in
Reply:If I was in your shoes I would sit down with him and lay all your cards out on the table. Don%26#039;t back down, and make yourself the number 2 priority in the situation. Tell him he has to go for the sake of the children. (kids alone should give you the strength to do it). Tell him you still want him to be part of their lives but only if he cleans up his act. If he doesn%26#039;t heed let him know your serious and pick up the phone to your local police department. They will if necessary remove him from your home. Last resort get out of the situation if his temper is really bad and seek a womens shelter to put you and your kids on the right track clear from him. It doesn%26#039;t has to be physical abuse for a police officer or shelter to help you. Mental and emotional abuse are real and relevant as well. Good luck with your situation. Also seek help from your church as well, they are very supportive and can help put you back on top.
Reply:You are just going to have to put your foot down once an for all. You can do better than that. You have to keep that in mind.
Reply:You know how to shorten a line without even touching that line? for that you have to put a bigger line beside that line so that line looks small enough. Your partner has got the feeling that you can not get rid of him, so he is enjoying. Get someone big close to you and feel big, he will have to leave and will not have the choice. that big can also be your girl friend or ex class mate, any one. But be careful for the selection of this Mr. Big, otherwise you can also go in more big trouble.
Reply:leave him for your kids sake. if you have a girl she will grow up to think its ok for a man to talk to her the way her daddy talked to her mommy or if you have a boy he will grow up thinking its ok for him to do that to a women. hearing this kinda of abuse in the home lowers there self esteem and they will put up with things from people in there personal lives when they get older. think of the long term effects this will have on your children.
Reply:If You are paying all the bills and doing most of the work around the house. He has no right to stay there. He is not a contributing member. So as long as you can stick to your guns you should be able to kick him out at any point.
You just have to put your kids first and yourown happiness first. Realize you home will be a happier place without him. Realize your kids will be come stronger more well adjusted people without him. That should give you the strength you need to kick him out.
Reply:hun if u dont love him theres nothing that should hold u bck...even ur kids(for what i can understand ur kids young ) so do something about it now wether u want to b with him 4ever or break up now for good and ur kids will not really get hurt later on.
treatment
How do I boot my %26quot;husband%26quot;?
I would write him a letter telling him how you feel and if he scoffs at it- too bad. You dont desearve to be treated like that- you desearve so much better. And if he refused to move out, know that you can file a resraining order. Name calling is verbal abuse and if his bad temper makes you fear for your safety- there will be no question as to whether they will grant it to you or not. But that is only for the exstreme
Hope this is help
Reply:I agree with you, he needs booted. Tell him you want something different, but no one but you can make you stick to your guns. If it were me, I would tell him that you need to see him take on more responsibility outside your home. That he needs to become self-sufficient on his own and then you can consider getting back together.
These types of men find change very difficult because someone is always bailing them out. Your right, he needs to grow up and even though you don%26#039;t want to be his mother, that is exactly what you have become. Your children will even suffer, it is their turn to be the kid, he had his chance.
Maybe he will seek counsel, but don%26#039;t be surprised if he doesn%26#039;t.
Reply:next time he leaves the house, change the locks..
Reply:id make him leave your kid%26#039;s should come first and they pick up cussing and he won%26#039;t work and help you and you did everything like a wife would do
Reply:Well, the bad news. It will not get better. Once a person starts with any kind of abuse, verbal, physical, psychological...it just gets easier. You HAVE to get him to leave before the time comes when you are so in his power you are helpless to evict him. Believe me it happens in abusive relationships. You get afraid for the children as well as yourself. Do it NOW! Good luck!
Reply:check eviction laws in your state.
In TX you could give him a letter giving him 3 days notice to move if there is no lease or written rental agreement.
If he%26#039;d abusive, you can call the cops, have him hauled off and get a restraining order. He%26#039;d be gone and subject to jail for returning. (works in just about any state)
There should be a local legal aid group you can ask how to take care of your specific situation.
Reply:You need to kick him out for your childrens sake. This man is a giant loser and a very bad role model for them.
Reply:so how about u just ask him nicely to leave and do not back up? if he doesn%26#039;t leave u always can inform the police if he doesn%26#039;t live there legally. but if he does u will need to move out with your kids yourself. too bad, next time u think twice before u let somebody in
Reply:If I was in your shoes I would sit down with him and lay all your cards out on the table. Don%26#039;t back down, and make yourself the number 2 priority in the situation. Tell him he has to go for the sake of the children. (kids alone should give you the strength to do it). Tell him you still want him to be part of their lives but only if he cleans up his act. If he doesn%26#039;t heed let him know your serious and pick up the phone to your local police department. They will if necessary remove him from your home. Last resort get out of the situation if his temper is really bad and seek a womens shelter to put you and your kids on the right track clear from him. It doesn%26#039;t has to be physical abuse for a police officer or shelter to help you. Mental and emotional abuse are real and relevant as well. Good luck with your situation. Also seek help from your church as well, they are very supportive and can help put you back on top.
Reply:You are just going to have to put your foot down once an for all. You can do better than that. You have to keep that in mind.
Reply:You know how to shorten a line without even touching that line? for that you have to put a bigger line beside that line so that line looks small enough. Your partner has got the feeling that you can not get rid of him, so he is enjoying. Get someone big close to you and feel big, he will have to leave and will not have the choice. that big can also be your girl friend or ex class mate, any one. But be careful for the selection of this Mr. Big, otherwise you can also go in more big trouble.
Reply:leave him for your kids sake. if you have a girl she will grow up to think its ok for a man to talk to her the way her daddy talked to her mommy or if you have a boy he will grow up thinking its ok for him to do that to a women. hearing this kinda of abuse in the home lowers there self esteem and they will put up with things from people in there personal lives when they get older. think of the long term effects this will have on your children.
Reply:If You are paying all the bills and doing most of the work around the house. He has no right to stay there. He is not a contributing member. So as long as you can stick to your guns you should be able to kick him out at any point.
You just have to put your kids first and yourown happiness first. Realize you home will be a happier place without him. Realize your kids will be come stronger more well adjusted people without him. That should give you the strength you need to kick him out.
Reply:hun if u dont love him theres nothing that should hold u bck...even ur kids(for what i can understand ur kids young ) so do something about it now wether u want to b with him 4ever or break up now for good and ur kids will not really get hurt later on.
treatment
Do any other Mom's have this problem with fitting their child's feet?
My daughter is 12 but she has 7 1/2 shoe size. Where can I find shoes esp dress shoes or winter boots that aren%26#039;t too old (sexy) or just too old (mature--old lady...lol)????? Any suggestions?
Do any other Mom%26#039;s have this problem with fitting their child%26#039;s feet?
Sadly i%26#039;m size 8 in shoes and i%26#039;m 13!You%26#039;d have to go to womans store but you can still get something..not to mature.
Reply:OH MY GOD!!! That%26#039;s just how I was. It%26#039;s totally normal. And I%26#039;m not just saying it because I was the same way but I%26#039;m telling you that you have nothing to worry about.
Reply:try mail order like lands end or other stores shoes don%26#039;t have to be in style at her age if they are you both have a problem
Reply:Wal-Mart (or Sam%26#039;s Club), depending on where you live has a lot of cute shoes. Also try Payless, or some of the stores in the mall. Take her with you to choose her shoes. She%26#039;ll be much happier with shoes that she chose on her own than shoes that you chose for her. Just set a price limit! If she finds shoes that she likes that are over the price limit, then keep your eyes out for something similar.
Sketchers is a good brand with lots of cute shoes.
books b
Do any other Mom%26#039;s have this problem with fitting their child%26#039;s feet?
Sadly i%26#039;m size 8 in shoes and i%26#039;m 13!You%26#039;d have to go to womans store but you can still get something..not to mature.
Reply:OH MY GOD!!! That%26#039;s just how I was. It%26#039;s totally normal. And I%26#039;m not just saying it because I was the same way but I%26#039;m telling you that you have nothing to worry about.
Reply:try mail order like lands end or other stores shoes don%26#039;t have to be in style at her age if they are you both have a problem
Reply:Wal-Mart (or Sam%26#039;s Club), depending on where you live has a lot of cute shoes. Also try Payless, or some of the stores in the mall. Take her with you to choose her shoes. She%26#039;ll be much happier with shoes that she chose on her own than shoes that you chose for her. Just set a price limit! If she finds shoes that she likes that are over the price limit, then keep your eyes out for something similar.
Sketchers is a good brand with lots of cute shoes.
books b
Have you ever intentionally destroyed a child's toy as punishment? What was the toy and how did you destroy it
My stepmom threw my Star Wars toys in a garbage burner and broke several of my toys with her cowboy boots. She even backed over my one of my plastic spaceships with her pickup. Did anything like this happen to you as a kid?
Have you ever intentionally destroyed a child%26#039;s toy as punishment? What was the toy and how did you destroy it
Yes. It is a very nasty thing for an adult to do. Your stepmother should be punished for her actions against you. If your father won%26#039;t re-act, then take the matter into your own hands. Figure out what to do, I am sure you are resourceful. An eye for an eye, tooth for tooth, etc.
Reply:There%26#039;s two sides to every story, I%26#039;m sure we%26#039;re only hearing how horrible your step mom is and not how horrible you were to her before she did this, as you mention it was a punishment. Yes, I would throw away my childs toys if they refused to put them away or were otherwise intentionally disrespectful to them and me. If they don%26#039;t respect their toys that I spent MY money on to purchase for them, then I see no reason for my money, time, and purchase to be disrespected. Right into the garbage bin they go. Nothing of yours belongs to you. Your parents spend THEIR money on items for you.
Reply:I broke my mobile %26#039;phone when I was angry. Is that what you call %26quot;self harm%26quot;?
Reply:Oh, yes. My mother had some serious anger issues. In place of hugs and quality time together she would show love by buying me all kinds of wonderful toys, especiallly dolls and stuffed animals which I came to love as I would her. Every child needs something to love back, if not their parent. Then she would get angry at me and overreact as a result of her own life choices and she would throw things, breaking them on our walls and putting rips in them with her shoes.
Now as a result I am debilitatingly materialistic. I cannot stand to see anything destroyed or damaged, even thrown away. I can%26#039;t get over it. New things make me happy and seeing my things get systematically desroyed by my roommates makes me cry.
Please, I beg everyone who reads this, do not ever disregard a child%26#039;s impressionable mind!
Reply:No, she was acting spiteful and childish herself. I would take a toy away from an older child (7+) and make him donate it but not one so young that they can%26#039;t understand. I would teach him that if he can%26#039;t appreciate his toys then he can give them to someone else who will. But to intentionally and cruelly destroy the toy in front of the child - no, that is emotional abuse.
Reply:i told my stepdaughter, when we bought the mouse, that if she didn%26#039;t keep the cage clean i would put the mouse outside so the cats could get it.
she didn%26#039;t believe me.
it hadn%26#039;t been cleaned in over a week and i told her 2 times (once in the morning when she woke up and once around lunch time) to clean it before 5:oo. at 4:30 i told her again to have it cleaned by 5:oo or the mouse goes outside.
at 5:oo she was standing by the cage with her hands on her hips telling me %26quot; you can%26#039;t take it outside. i won%26#039;t let you HAHAHA. %26quot;
she found out differently.
that cat had SO MUCH FUN playing with it.
she was 9 or 10 years old. old enough to know to clean it and old enough to know i wasn%26#039;t playing when i said to have it clean.
Reply:Damn, way to traumatize a kid! No, nothing like that ever happened to me....I was a perfect little angel, lol. I would never do anything like THAT to my kids either. I take things away for awhile, but they%26#039;re able to earn them back with good behavior.
Reply:that was really mean of her. i would never do that to my kid. but i do occasionally go through his toys and throw out all the little happy meal toys or the broken and destroyed toys. i consider all those things junk, but i would never throw away his action figures or a toy i know he loves or actually plays with.
my mother used to throw mine away because i was making a mess with it in the house. she didn%26#039;t do it in my face, but behind my back.
Reply:No, my toys were never destroyed like that.
I think there are more effective ways to discipline a child. It is acceptable to put a toy in %26quot;time out%26quot;, in other words, to take away the toy until the child starts behaving/ stops misbehaving.
Destroying toys like this is too harsh and could be considered abusive.
Reply:My gosh - what do you do to make her so mad??? If you really like your toys, maybe you should make sure they are all picked up and put away in your room (or wherever they belong). I know my three kids used to drive me crazy with toys all over the house until I started telling them that I had picked up whatever they had left in the living room and threw it away. Boy did they start making sure all their toys were put away properly. I then took down the box I had hidden in the garage and gave them back their toys and they loved me and loved their toys and I never had to worry about a messy house again!!
Reply:No, that%26#039;s cruel. I have taken toys away for a time, but never destroyed them.
I did work at a childrens%26#039; home once and another lady I worked with stomped on a kid%26#039;s watergun when he wouldn%26#039;t sit still in time out.
Reply:Nothing like that ever happened to me. Stop being such a bad little brat and maybe your toys will stop being destroyed.
Reply:Oh man!
Thats just wrong
Hopefully you wont turn out like that to your kids.
Thats pretty darn terrible.
Bad kids are really the result of bad parenting, and i can only wonder what role your father played in all of this.
But if that happened to me, Id defintely start a covert sabatoge campaign against her to let her know, you cant do that to me.
That is only if dad didnt do anything about it
books title c
Have you ever intentionally destroyed a child%26#039;s toy as punishment? What was the toy and how did you destroy it
Yes. It is a very nasty thing for an adult to do. Your stepmother should be punished for her actions against you. If your father won%26#039;t re-act, then take the matter into your own hands. Figure out what to do, I am sure you are resourceful. An eye for an eye, tooth for tooth, etc.
Reply:There%26#039;s two sides to every story, I%26#039;m sure we%26#039;re only hearing how horrible your step mom is and not how horrible you were to her before she did this, as you mention it was a punishment. Yes, I would throw away my childs toys if they refused to put them away or were otherwise intentionally disrespectful to them and me. If they don%26#039;t respect their toys that I spent MY money on to purchase for them, then I see no reason for my money, time, and purchase to be disrespected. Right into the garbage bin they go. Nothing of yours belongs to you. Your parents spend THEIR money on items for you.
Reply:I broke my mobile %26#039;phone when I was angry. Is that what you call %26quot;self harm%26quot;?
Reply:Oh, yes. My mother had some serious anger issues. In place of hugs and quality time together she would show love by buying me all kinds of wonderful toys, especiallly dolls and stuffed animals which I came to love as I would her. Every child needs something to love back, if not their parent. Then she would get angry at me and overreact as a result of her own life choices and she would throw things, breaking them on our walls and putting rips in them with her shoes.
Now as a result I am debilitatingly materialistic. I cannot stand to see anything destroyed or damaged, even thrown away. I can%26#039;t get over it. New things make me happy and seeing my things get systematically desroyed by my roommates makes me cry.
Please, I beg everyone who reads this, do not ever disregard a child%26#039;s impressionable mind!
Reply:No, she was acting spiteful and childish herself. I would take a toy away from an older child (7+) and make him donate it but not one so young that they can%26#039;t understand. I would teach him that if he can%26#039;t appreciate his toys then he can give them to someone else who will. But to intentionally and cruelly destroy the toy in front of the child - no, that is emotional abuse.
Reply:i told my stepdaughter, when we bought the mouse, that if she didn%26#039;t keep the cage clean i would put the mouse outside so the cats could get it.
she didn%26#039;t believe me.
it hadn%26#039;t been cleaned in over a week and i told her 2 times (once in the morning when she woke up and once around lunch time) to clean it before 5:oo. at 4:30 i told her again to have it cleaned by 5:oo or the mouse goes outside.
at 5:oo she was standing by the cage with her hands on her hips telling me %26quot; you can%26#039;t take it outside. i won%26#039;t let you HAHAHA. %26quot;
she found out differently.
that cat had SO MUCH FUN playing with it.
she was 9 or 10 years old. old enough to know to clean it and old enough to know i wasn%26#039;t playing when i said to have it clean.
Reply:Damn, way to traumatize a kid! No, nothing like that ever happened to me....I was a perfect little angel, lol. I would never do anything like THAT to my kids either. I take things away for awhile, but they%26#039;re able to earn them back with good behavior.
Reply:that was really mean of her. i would never do that to my kid. but i do occasionally go through his toys and throw out all the little happy meal toys or the broken and destroyed toys. i consider all those things junk, but i would never throw away his action figures or a toy i know he loves or actually plays with.
my mother used to throw mine away because i was making a mess with it in the house. she didn%26#039;t do it in my face, but behind my back.
Reply:No, my toys were never destroyed like that.
I think there are more effective ways to discipline a child. It is acceptable to put a toy in %26quot;time out%26quot;, in other words, to take away the toy until the child starts behaving/ stops misbehaving.
Destroying toys like this is too harsh and could be considered abusive.
Reply:My gosh - what do you do to make her so mad??? If you really like your toys, maybe you should make sure they are all picked up and put away in your room (or wherever they belong). I know my three kids used to drive me crazy with toys all over the house until I started telling them that I had picked up whatever they had left in the living room and threw it away. Boy did they start making sure all their toys were put away properly. I then took down the box I had hidden in the garage and gave them back their toys and they loved me and loved their toys and I never had to worry about a messy house again!!
Reply:No, that%26#039;s cruel. I have taken toys away for a time, but never destroyed them.
I did work at a childrens%26#039; home once and another lady I worked with stomped on a kid%26#039;s watergun when he wouldn%26#039;t sit still in time out.
Reply:Nothing like that ever happened to me. Stop being such a bad little brat and maybe your toys will stop being destroyed.
Reply:Oh man!
Thats just wrong
Hopefully you wont turn out like that to your kids.
Thats pretty darn terrible.
Bad kids are really the result of bad parenting, and i can only wonder what role your father played in all of this.
But if that happened to me, Id defintely start a covert sabatoge campaign against her to let her know, you cant do that to me.
That is only if dad didnt do anything about it
books title c
Only in AMERICA /STUPID PEOPLE /DUMB FACTS. FUNNY MUST READ!?
1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
3. Only in America......do stores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won%26#039;t miss a call from someone we didn%26#039;t want to talk to in the first place.
8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
9. Only in America......do we use the word %26#039;politics%26#039; to describe the process so well: %26#039;Poli%26#039; in Latin meaning %26#039;many%26#039; and %26#039;tics%26#039; meaning %26#039;bloodsucking creatures%26#039;
10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM%26#039;s with Braille lettering.
---------------
EVER WONDER
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can%26#039;t put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don%26#039;t you ever see the headline %26quot;Psychic Wins Lottery%26quot;?
Why is %26quot;abbreviated%26quot; such a long word?
*Why is it that doctors call what they do %26quot;practice%26quot;?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dish washing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn%26#039;t there mouse-flavored cat food?
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
Why didn%26#039;t Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don%26#039;t they make the whole plane out of that stuff??
Why don%26#039;t sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
------------------
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( I have no other time to dry my hair).
On a bag of Frito%26#039;s: ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Dial soap: %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (and that would be how...?)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot; ( But, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion).
On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot; (well... a bit late, huh?)
On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding: %26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot; (...noooo... Really?)
On packaging for a Rowena iron: %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot; (but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time?)
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine: %26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot; (and.. .I%26#039;m taking this because...?)
On most brands of Christmas lights: %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot; (as opposed to... what?)
On a Japanese food processor: %26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot; (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury%26#039;s peanuts: %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: %26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot; (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child%26#039;s superman costume: %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot; (I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: %26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.%26quot; (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Only in AMERICA /STUPID PEOPLE /DUMB FACTS. FUNNY MUST READ!?
A few more for you? Not that you have not listed MANY good ones as is:
Would a fly without wngs be called a %26quot;walk%26quot;?
If a DEAF child is caught cursing, do the parents wash out his HANDS?
How do we get deer to cross right at the yelow sign?
Why is called %26quot;Alcoholics Anonymous%26quot; when the first you do is state your name and that you are an alcoholic?
Only in America can you complain if your coffee is too cold and file a law suit when it is too hot...(I mean isn%26#039;t coffee supposed to be HOT?!)
Why do we drive on a paerkway and park in the driveway?
Reply:LMAO just about to leave work and that was hilarious glad I got to read before walking out the door!
Reply:hilarious man i heard all this before but hearing it again makes me lagh =]
Reply:Those were great! Thank you!
Only in America where you can get a pizza delivered faster to your door (and guaranteed to be hot or it%26#039;s free) than an ambulance before the victim dies and the body gets cold and you still have to pay for the ambulance service!
Reply:cool..thanx
Reply:OMG Thoses are really Good. I thought about printing them out even! Here have a STAR!!!
Reply:So funny....incredibly true!!!!
Reply:5, 6 and 7 are hilarious!
Reply:LOLZ
OMG DAMN I NEVER REALIZED HOW STUPID WE (america) CAN BE
LOL HAHAHHAHAAAAAAAA
Reply:I loved #9. If there ever was a truth about the meaning of the word politics, that is it. Thanks for the laugh!
Reply:thanks that was great.
Reply:lol.
Reply:lol funny stuff
Reply:I just wasted 5 minutes of my life...at least it was kind of interesting I guess.
Reply:lolol that made my day. I haven%26#039;t laughed so hard in ages. Thanks. :)
Reply:Wow, I%26#039;ve never spent so much time reading a %26#039;question%26#039;. lol. that was good though.
dental
2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
3. Only in America......do stores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won%26#039;t miss a call from someone we didn%26#039;t want to talk to in the first place.
8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
9. Only in America......do we use the word %26#039;politics%26#039; to describe the process so well: %26#039;Poli%26#039; in Latin meaning %26#039;many%26#039; and %26#039;tics%26#039; meaning %26#039;bloodsucking creatures%26#039;
10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM%26#039;s with Braille lettering.
---------------
EVER WONDER
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can%26#039;t put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don%26#039;t you ever see the headline %26quot;Psychic Wins Lottery%26quot;?
Why is %26quot;abbreviated%26quot; such a long word?
*Why is it that doctors call what they do %26quot;practice%26quot;?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dish washing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn%26#039;t there mouse-flavored cat food?
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
Why didn%26#039;t Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don%26#039;t they make the whole plane out of that stuff??
Why don%26#039;t sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
------------------
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( I have no other time to dry my hair).
On a bag of Frito%26#039;s: ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Dial soap: %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (and that would be how...?)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot; ( But, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion).
On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot; (well... a bit late, huh?)
On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding: %26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot; (...noooo... Really?)
On packaging for a Rowena iron: %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot; (but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time?)
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine: %26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot; (and.. .I%26#039;m taking this because...?)
On most brands of Christmas lights: %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot; (as opposed to... what?)
On a Japanese food processor: %26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot; (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury%26#039;s peanuts: %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: %26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot; (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child%26#039;s superman costume: %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot; (I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: %26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.%26quot; (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Only in AMERICA /STUPID PEOPLE /DUMB FACTS. FUNNY MUST READ!?
A few more for you? Not that you have not listed MANY good ones as is:
Would a fly without wngs be called a %26quot;walk%26quot;?
If a DEAF child is caught cursing, do the parents wash out his HANDS?
How do we get deer to cross right at the yelow sign?
Why is called %26quot;Alcoholics Anonymous%26quot; when the first you do is state your name and that you are an alcoholic?
Only in America can you complain if your coffee is too cold and file a law suit when it is too hot...(I mean isn%26#039;t coffee supposed to be HOT?!)
Why do we drive on a paerkway and park in the driveway?
Reply:LMAO just about to leave work and that was hilarious glad I got to read before walking out the door!
Reply:hilarious man i heard all this before but hearing it again makes me lagh =]
Reply:Those were great! Thank you!
Only in America where you can get a pizza delivered faster to your door (and guaranteed to be hot or it%26#039;s free) than an ambulance before the victim dies and the body gets cold and you still have to pay for the ambulance service!
Reply:cool..thanx
Reply:OMG Thoses are really Good. I thought about printing them out even! Here have a STAR!!!
Reply:So funny....incredibly true!!!!
Reply:5, 6 and 7 are hilarious!
Reply:LOLZ
OMG DAMN I NEVER REALIZED HOW STUPID WE (america) CAN BE
LOL HAHAHHAHAAAAAAAA
Reply:I loved #9. If there ever was a truth about the meaning of the word politics, that is it. Thanks for the laugh!
Reply:thanks that was great.
Reply:lol.
Reply:lol funny stuff
Reply:I just wasted 5 minutes of my life...at least it was kind of interesting I guess.
Reply:lolol that made my day. I haven%26#039;t laughed so hard in ages. Thanks. :)
Reply:Wow, I%26#039;ve never spent so much time reading a %26#039;question%26#039;. lol. that was good though.
dental
Have there ever been any accounts of spirits entering a person's dreams?
When I was younger I lived in a haunted house. To give you an idea of why I said its haunted, there was sometimes boots stomping up and down the stairs late at night, my mother saw a woman in a night gown fade away, my father saw a tiny child%26#039;s rocking chair rock back and forth for about 2-3 min. There was no breeze or anything to make the chair rock.
I didn%26#039;t witness any of these things happen, but ever since we had moved into the old two story house I had nightmare like dreams. Basically, in the dream it would be pitch black and there would be faces laughing hysterically non-stop, pure insanity. It happened almost every single night after I went to sleep and it was always the same dream with the same details. After we moved, the nightmares stopped.
Have there ever been any accounts of spirits entering a person%26#039;s dreams?
Sounds like they were tryng to tell you something , this a very common way for spirits to communicate with you....as you are more relaxed and open to them when you are asleep. I%26#039;ll bet if you researched the house you will find the history of these laughing people.
WHen they stood over you laughing was it in a hostile/crazy way? or were they trying to get you to join in the games and fun? Did you see the faces clearly? Could you point htem out if you saw a photograph of the people? You should ask some neighbors about the history of your property.... or you can look it up at the local library.
Reply:Thanks for choosing my answer , best answer. It is nice to know that others went through what I went through as a kid, makes me feel more a part of this world. Report It
Reply:I am positive someone once remembered a dream in which they are *positive* they were visited by a spirit. Such a claim would have the same scientific veracity as any other subjective anecdotal experience--that is, none. In other words, just because a person experienced an unusual %26quot;visitation%26quot;--in of all places a dream--doesn%26#039;t validate the claim or even the possibility that such a thing really happened.
Reply:It%26#039;s no wonder you have nightmares.With your parents scaring the daylights out of you.I%26#039;ll tell you something they should have.There is no such thing as ghosts.
Reply:Yes, there is, and people can enter other%26#039;s dreams too.
Reply:Thanks for this question. I%26#039;ve wondered this myself. I keep dreaming about a person who did horrible things to me and I don%26#039;t want to even think about him. The dreams are not about what he did,but different things I%26#039;ve never thought about. I%26#039;ve tried pills (pres) to make it stop..but keeps on..for years. Not scary dreams..just him in my dreams.( He knew how to do spiritual things.)Anyway, thanks for sharing.
Reply:Everyone%26#039;s beliefs are different. When I dream of someone close to me that has died, I believe our spirits (their%26#039;s and mine) are in communion. Sometimes they want to tell me something specific. Sometimes they just want to hang out. Mostly it%26#039;s a positive thing, though not always. Sometimes it%26#039;s an answer to a question or problem that has been bothering me.
Reply:its very common for spirits to communicate to you through your dreams, i believe its easier that way for them to make the connection.. ive had spirits visit me in my dreams, mostly people i knew that have died..they gave me messages or to let me know they were happy and ok..but then also some can haunt you for what ever reason...
Reply:No, Freddy Krueger notwithstanding.
Reply:Spirits and ghost do not act in that manner. There seems from your explaination to be negative energy there but caused by what, I am not sure. Do you ever smell odd odors about the house? If so, it is not energy from a negitive ghost I will assure you.
Reply:Peter D,
It also doesn%26#039;t invalidate the claim or the possibility that such things are possible. Absence of proof is not proof of absence.
Visitation dreams are quite common and usually seem much more vivid or real than normal dreams. It is not unusual to hear someone relate an experience where a loved one passed away then came to them in a dream to say goodbye or comfort them. These usually do not persist, only happening once, but may reoccur years later if they have a message for you or feel you need their guidance.
Your experience is completely different and sounds like you were just having bad dreams from daily occurrences and things you heard or heard about during the day.
Credit Report
I didn%26#039;t witness any of these things happen, but ever since we had moved into the old two story house I had nightmare like dreams. Basically, in the dream it would be pitch black and there would be faces laughing hysterically non-stop, pure insanity. It happened almost every single night after I went to sleep and it was always the same dream with the same details. After we moved, the nightmares stopped.
Have there ever been any accounts of spirits entering a person%26#039;s dreams?
Sounds like they were tryng to tell you something , this a very common way for spirits to communicate with you....as you are more relaxed and open to them when you are asleep. I%26#039;ll bet if you researched the house you will find the history of these laughing people.
WHen they stood over you laughing was it in a hostile/crazy way? or were they trying to get you to join in the games and fun? Did you see the faces clearly? Could you point htem out if you saw a photograph of the people? You should ask some neighbors about the history of your property.... or you can look it up at the local library.
Reply:Thanks for choosing my answer , best answer. It is nice to know that others went through what I went through as a kid, makes me feel more a part of this world. Report It
Reply:I am positive someone once remembered a dream in which they are *positive* they were visited by a spirit. Such a claim would have the same scientific veracity as any other subjective anecdotal experience--that is, none. In other words, just because a person experienced an unusual %26quot;visitation%26quot;--in of all places a dream--doesn%26#039;t validate the claim or even the possibility that such a thing really happened.
Reply:It%26#039;s no wonder you have nightmares.With your parents scaring the daylights out of you.I%26#039;ll tell you something they should have.There is no such thing as ghosts.
Reply:Yes, there is, and people can enter other%26#039;s dreams too.
Reply:Thanks for this question. I%26#039;ve wondered this myself. I keep dreaming about a person who did horrible things to me and I don%26#039;t want to even think about him. The dreams are not about what he did,but different things I%26#039;ve never thought about. I%26#039;ve tried pills (pres) to make it stop..but keeps on..for years. Not scary dreams..just him in my dreams.( He knew how to do spiritual things.)Anyway, thanks for sharing.
Reply:Everyone%26#039;s beliefs are different. When I dream of someone close to me that has died, I believe our spirits (their%26#039;s and mine) are in communion. Sometimes they want to tell me something specific. Sometimes they just want to hang out. Mostly it%26#039;s a positive thing, though not always. Sometimes it%26#039;s an answer to a question or problem that has been bothering me.
Reply:its very common for spirits to communicate to you through your dreams, i believe its easier that way for them to make the connection.. ive had spirits visit me in my dreams, mostly people i knew that have died..they gave me messages or to let me know they were happy and ok..but then also some can haunt you for what ever reason...
Reply:No, Freddy Krueger notwithstanding.
Reply:Spirits and ghost do not act in that manner. There seems from your explaination to be negative energy there but caused by what, I am not sure. Do you ever smell odd odors about the house? If so, it is not energy from a negitive ghost I will assure you.
Reply:Peter D,
It also doesn%26#039;t invalidate the claim or the possibility that such things are possible. Absence of proof is not proof of absence.
Visitation dreams are quite common and usually seem much more vivid or real than normal dreams. It is not unusual to hear someone relate an experience where a loved one passed away then came to them in a dream to say goodbye or comfort them. These usually do not persist, only happening once, but may reoccur years later if they have a message for you or feel you need their guidance.
Your experience is completely different and sounds like you were just having bad dreams from daily occurrences and things you heard or heard about during the day.
Credit Report
Things You Need To Know !!!?
In Honor of Stupid People
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(Damn, and that%26#039;s the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Dial soap -- %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot;
(and that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot;
(but, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion).
On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot;
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding -- %26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot;
(..and you thought????...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot;
(but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time)?
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine -- %26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot;
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot;
(and...I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights -- %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot;
(as opposed to...what)?
On a Japanese food processor -- %26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot;
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
On Sainsbury%26#039;s peanuts -- %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot;
(talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- %26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot;
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child%26#039;s Superman costume -- %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot;
(I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw -- %26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot;
(Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Things You Need To Know !!!?
Really great. Thnx.
Reply:wow!! dude i always wondered about these things! Thanks! i always wondered why my frozen dinners were so hard and how do you actually use real soap? Do you scrub, do you rub, i%26#039;ve tried everything???!!! LOL!! Thanaks for the good laugh!!!
Reply:ode to stupid people, take note of these instructions, you idiots.
Reply:HaHaHa!!
Yup that is a funny one.
Thanks for sharing!
Reply:You got that right. I can%26#039;t believe some of label instructions I read.
Reply:thats really funny
Reply:HAHAHA....damn we%26#039;re stupid...
Reply:a can of polyurathane says %26quot;DO NOT DRINK%26quot; as if someone would put it on the rocks...duh
Reply:wo are you serious thats funny!!
Reply:Those are really funny. I needed a laugh so thanks for that!
Reply:That is all right! LOL.
Reply:haha yeah someone posted this but its still hilarious especially the christmas lights lol ♥
Reply:this is funny stuff....lol
and you know people had to try this stuff for them to suggest these warnings..lol..
Reply:omfg so funny!
Reply:what are people actually thinking, Some one should reply to these places and thank them for stating the obvious with their products.
Reply:ROFLMFAO!!! Those were hilarious!!! I especially love the last one...
Reply:OMG!!! I cried laughing reading this, very true and so funny..Especially the Japanese instructions :D
Reply:I find these disclaimers amusing. It is not the user of the products who are stupid. The ones who made the disclaimers are stupid.
Reply:very funny
Reply:lollllllllllllllllll
i think they are really funny
ohhhhhhhhhhmen
Reply:heehee. way funny.
i saw instructions for the use of a pressure cooker -
DO NOT OPERATE UNDER PRESSURE WHEN USING OIL.
Loan forum
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(Damn, and that%26#039;s the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Dial soap -- %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot;
(and that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot;
(but, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion).
On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot;
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding -- %26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot;
(..and you thought????...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot;
(but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time)?
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine -- %26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot;
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot;
(and...I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights -- %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot;
(as opposed to...what)?
On a Japanese food processor -- %26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot;
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
On Sainsbury%26#039;s peanuts -- %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot;
(talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- %26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot;
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child%26#039;s Superman costume -- %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot;
(I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw -- %26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot;
(Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Things You Need To Know !!!?
Really great. Thnx.
Reply:wow!! dude i always wondered about these things! Thanks! i always wondered why my frozen dinners were so hard and how do you actually use real soap? Do you scrub, do you rub, i%26#039;ve tried everything???!!! LOL!! Thanaks for the good laugh!!!
Reply:ode to stupid people, take note of these instructions, you idiots.
Reply:HaHaHa!!
Yup that is a funny one.
Thanks for sharing!
Reply:You got that right. I can%26#039;t believe some of label instructions I read.
Reply:thats really funny
Reply:HAHAHA....damn we%26#039;re stupid...
Reply:a can of polyurathane says %26quot;DO NOT DRINK%26quot; as if someone would put it on the rocks...duh
Reply:wo are you serious thats funny!!
Reply:Those are really funny. I needed a laugh so thanks for that!
Reply:That is all right! LOL.
Reply:haha yeah someone posted this but its still hilarious especially the christmas lights lol ♥
Reply:this is funny stuff....lol
and you know people had to try this stuff for them to suggest these warnings..lol..
Reply:omfg so funny!
Reply:what are people actually thinking, Some one should reply to these places and thank them for stating the obvious with their products.
Reply:ROFLMFAO!!! Those were hilarious!!! I especially love the last one...
Reply:OMG!!! I cried laughing reading this, very true and so funny..Especially the Japanese instructions :D
Reply:I find these disclaimers amusing. It is not the user of the products who are stupid. The ones who made the disclaimers are stupid.
Reply:very funny
Reply:lollllllllllllllllll
i think they are really funny
ohhhhhhhhhhmen
Reply:heehee. way funny.
i saw instructions for the use of a pressure cooker -
DO NOT OPERATE UNDER PRESSURE WHEN USING OIL.
Loan forum
Only in america..?
1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won%26#039;t miss a call from someone we didn%26#039;t want to talk to in the first place.
8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
9. Only in America......do we use the word %26#039;politics%26#039; to describe the process so well: %26#039;Poli%26#039; in Latin meaning %26#039;many%26#039; and %26#039;tics%26#039; meaning %26#039;bloodsucking creatures%26#039;
.
10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM%26#039;s with Braille lettering.
EVER WONDER
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can%26#039;t put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don%26#039;t you ever see the headline %26quot;Psychic Wins Lottery%26quot;?
Why is %26quot;abbreviated%26quot; such a long word?
*Why is it that doctors call what they do %26quot;practice%26quot;?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why aren%26#039;t the letters on a keyboard in order?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn%26#039;t there mouse-flavored cat food?
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
Why didn%26#039;t Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don%26#039;t they make the whole plane out of that stuff??
Why don%26#039;t sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
------------------
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( I have no other time to dry my hair).
On a bag of Fritos:! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap: %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (and that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot; ( But, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion).
On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot; (well.... a bit late huh?)
On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding: %26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot; (...nahhh... Really??...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot; (but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time?)
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine: %26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot; (and.. .I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights: %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot; (as opposed to... what?)
On a Japanese food processor: %26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot; (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury%26#039;s peanuts: %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: %26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot; (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child%26#039;s superman costume: %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot; (I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: %26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot; (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Only in america..?
Funny!! Thanks!!
P.S. I CAN put on mascara with my mouth closed!
Reply:whoever voted....THANKS!! Hahahahahah!! Report It
Reply:Lol
That made my day
Reply:LOL! It%26#039;s great. =)
Reply:lol wow a good one
Reply:lol!
Reply:lol that%26#039;s one of the funniest things i%26#039;ve seen
..I know why they don%26#039;t make the aeroplanes out of the black box crap, its because it would be to heavy for an aeroplane to lift off.
Reply:ahhh-choo.
Reply:lol
Reply:i love this they are all soo funny i want to tell my friends on how good this page is ....!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:I can answer the one about the typewriters. When typewriters were first invented, it was found that some people could type fast enough to have the keys jam. Remember, the machines were mechanical with the levers rising to strike the ribbon. The current keyboard was configured to slow down the typist long enough for the letter arms to clear each other. The configuration has stayed this way out of habit.
Reply:Those are pretty good
Reply:haha....thank you!!
Reply:THANK YOU SOMUCH THIS WAS SO ENTERTAINING DURING MY BORDEM, THAAAAAAAANK YOUUUUUUUUUU SOOOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:oh my god im giving u a star! woo hoo! it%26#039;s sad but true.
Reply:LOL loved that!
Reply:These are sooo old they aren%26#039;t even funny anymore.
And %26quot;poli%26quot; and %26quot;tics%26quot; are not Latin words.
Reply:Thanks, you are a world of information!~~
Reply:lol
Reply:wow, u just made my day...star for u
Loan forum
2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won%26#039;t miss a call from someone we didn%26#039;t want to talk to in the first place.
8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
9. Only in America......do we use the word %26#039;politics%26#039; to describe the process so well: %26#039;Poli%26#039; in Latin meaning %26#039;many%26#039; and %26#039;tics%26#039; meaning %26#039;bloodsucking creatures%26#039;
.
10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM%26#039;s with Braille lettering.
EVER WONDER
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can%26#039;t put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don%26#039;t you ever see the headline %26quot;Psychic Wins Lottery%26quot;?
Why is %26quot;abbreviated%26quot; such a long word?
*Why is it that doctors call what they do %26quot;practice%26quot;?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why aren%26#039;t the letters on a keyboard in order?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn%26#039;t there mouse-flavored cat food?
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
Why didn%26#039;t Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don%26#039;t they make the whole plane out of that stuff??
Why don%26#039;t sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
------------------
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( I have no other time to dry my hair).
On a bag of Fritos:! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap: %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (and that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot; ( But, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion).
On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot; (well.... a bit late huh?)
On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding: %26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot; (...nahhh... Really??...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot; (but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time?)
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine: %26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot; (and.. .I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights: %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot; (as opposed to... what?)
On a Japanese food processor: %26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot; (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury%26#039;s peanuts: %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: %26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot; (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child%26#039;s superman costume: %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot; (I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: %26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot; (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Only in america..?
Funny!! Thanks!!
P.S. I CAN put on mascara with my mouth closed!
Reply:whoever voted....THANKS!! Hahahahahah!! Report It
Reply:Lol
That made my day
Reply:LOL! It%26#039;s great. =)
Reply:lol wow a good one
Reply:lol!
Reply:lol that%26#039;s one of the funniest things i%26#039;ve seen
..I know why they don%26#039;t make the aeroplanes out of the black box crap, its because it would be to heavy for an aeroplane to lift off.
Reply:ahhh-choo.
Reply:lol
Reply:i love this they are all soo funny i want to tell my friends on how good this page is ....!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:I can answer the one about the typewriters. When typewriters were first invented, it was found that some people could type fast enough to have the keys jam. Remember, the machines were mechanical with the levers rising to strike the ribbon. The current keyboard was configured to slow down the typist long enough for the letter arms to clear each other. The configuration has stayed this way out of habit.
Reply:Those are pretty good
Reply:haha....thank you!!
Reply:THANK YOU SOMUCH THIS WAS SO ENTERTAINING DURING MY BORDEM, THAAAAAAAANK YOUUUUUUUUUU SOOOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:oh my god im giving u a star! woo hoo! it%26#039;s sad but true.
Reply:LOL loved that!
Reply:These are sooo old they aren%26#039;t even funny anymore.
And %26quot;poli%26quot; and %26quot;tics%26quot; are not Latin words.
Reply:Thanks, you are a world of information!~~
Reply:lol
Reply:wow, u just made my day...star for u
Loan forum
Funny instructions?
1. On a blanket from Taiwan -
NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO.
(ah well, ill just have to find a magic carpet instead)
2. On a helmet mounted mirror used by US cyclists -
REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU.
( really? I thought I was imagining them to be there)
3. On a Taiwanese shampoo -
USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.
( I wouldn’t do that if I were you)
4. On the bottle-top of a (UK) flavoured milk drink -
AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.
(why? Is everything going to spill out if I don’t?)
5. On a New Zealand insect spray -
THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.
( are you sure this stuff works?)
6. In a US guide to setting up a new computer -
TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING.
(Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.)
7. In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles -
OPEN OTHER END.
(really? I thought that the coke would come out of the bottom through an imaginary hole)
8.On a Sears hairdryer – DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.
(Shoot, and that%26#039;s the only time I have to work on my hair.)
9.On a bag of Fritos -
YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. DETAILS INSIDE.
(The shoplifter special!)
10. On a bar of Dial soap -
DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP.
(And that would be, how?)
11. On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box) –
DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.
(Damn! Too late, I just turned it over)
12. On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding -
PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.
(Are you sure? Let%26#039;s experiment.)
13. On a Korean kitchen knife –
WARNING: KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.
(Hey! Who are they to tell me what to do with my kids?)
14.On most brands of Christmas lights -- %26quot;FOR INDOOR OR OUT DOOR USE ONLY”
(as opposed to...what use in outer space)?
15.On a Japanese food processor -- %26quot;NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE.%26quot;
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit confused)
16. On Sainsbury%26#039;s peanuts -
WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS.
(Really? Peanuts contain nuts? )
17. On an American Airlines packet of nuts
INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.
(I%26#039;m glad they cleared that up.)
18. On a Swedish chainsaw -
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.
(aw! I was hopping this would stop the chainsaw faster.?)
19.On some Swanson frozen dinners -- %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot;
(frozen dinners? I think I will just eat it as it is seeing as its ‘JUST’ a sujestion)
20.On packaging for a Rowena iron -- %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot;
(but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time)?
21.On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine -- %26quot;DO NOT DRIVE OR OPPERATE MACHINERY AFTER USE (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
22.On Nytol Sleep Aid -- %26quot;WARNING: MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.%26quot;
(and...I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
23.On a child%26#039;s Superman costume -- %26quot;WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY
(I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
Funny instructions?
i like the small appliance ones: do not use while bathing
do not use while sleeping
Reply:I am only sorry that I can only give 1 star...this is funny as hell
Reply:funny
Reply:This is some Funny stuff, Thanks for the Laugh
Reply:you can%26#039;t stop a chainsaw with your genitals??
Reply:I saw a road sign that said %26#039;warning road wet when raining%26#039;
it was funny as hell, and then i almost drove into a bush lol
Reply:Hahaha! Wow that made me laugh!
Thanks for that!
Reply:Nice! Thanks for the entertainment!
Reply:awww thats why i hit the ground after jumping off of the shed.. damn superman costume
Reply:wow....
Reply:haha! I LOVE THIS! im gonna send it to my friends! where did you find this? my favorite is number 23. so cute! thanks for the laugh!
acne scar
NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO.
(ah well, ill just have to find a magic carpet instead)
2. On a helmet mounted mirror used by US cyclists -
REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU.
( really? I thought I was imagining them to be there)
3. On a Taiwanese shampoo -
USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.
( I wouldn’t do that if I were you)
4. On the bottle-top of a (UK) flavoured milk drink -
AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.
(why? Is everything going to spill out if I don’t?)
5. On a New Zealand insect spray -
THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.
( are you sure this stuff works?)
6. In a US guide to setting up a new computer -
TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING.
(Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.)
7. In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles -
OPEN OTHER END.
(really? I thought that the coke would come out of the bottom through an imaginary hole)
8.On a Sears hairdryer – DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.
(Shoot, and that%26#039;s the only time I have to work on my hair.)
9.On a bag of Fritos -
YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. DETAILS INSIDE.
(The shoplifter special!)
10. On a bar of Dial soap -
DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP.
(And that would be, how?)
11. On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box) –
DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.
(Damn! Too late, I just turned it over)
12. On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding -
PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.
(Are you sure? Let%26#039;s experiment.)
13. On a Korean kitchen knife –
WARNING: KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.
(Hey! Who are they to tell me what to do with my kids?)
14.On most brands of Christmas lights -- %26quot;FOR INDOOR OR OUT DOOR USE ONLY”
(as opposed to...what use in outer space)?
15.On a Japanese food processor -- %26quot;NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE.%26quot;
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit confused)
16. On Sainsbury%26#039;s peanuts -
WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS.
(Really? Peanuts contain nuts? )
17. On an American Airlines packet of nuts
INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.
(I%26#039;m glad they cleared that up.)
18. On a Swedish chainsaw -
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.
(aw! I was hopping this would stop the chainsaw faster.?)
19.On some Swanson frozen dinners -- %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot;
(frozen dinners? I think I will just eat it as it is seeing as its ‘JUST’ a sujestion)
20.On packaging for a Rowena iron -- %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot;
(but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time)?
21.On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine -- %26quot;DO NOT DRIVE OR OPPERATE MACHINERY AFTER USE (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
22.On Nytol Sleep Aid -- %26quot;WARNING: MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.%26quot;
(and...I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
23.On a child%26#039;s Superman costume -- %26quot;WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY
(I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
Funny instructions?
i like the small appliance ones: do not use while bathing
do not use while sleeping
Reply:I am only sorry that I can only give 1 star...this is funny as hell
Reply:funny
Reply:This is some Funny stuff, Thanks for the Laugh
Reply:you can%26#039;t stop a chainsaw with your genitals??
Reply:I saw a road sign that said %26#039;warning road wet when raining%26#039;
it was funny as hell, and then i almost drove into a bush lol
Reply:Hahaha! Wow that made me laugh!
Thanks for that!
Reply:Nice! Thanks for the entertainment!
Reply:awww thats why i hit the ground after jumping off of the shed.. damn superman costume
Reply:wow....
Reply:haha! I LOVE THIS! im gonna send it to my friends! where did you find this? my favorite is number 23. so cute! thanks for the laugh!
acne scar
What do you think? funny?
Packaging warnings
The following are all taken from packaging: we live in a frightening world
On a Sears hairdryer:
%26quot;Do not use while sleeping.%26quot;
On a bag of Fritos:
%26quot;You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.%26quot;
On a bar of Dial soap:
%26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot;
On some Swanson frozen dinners:
%26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot;
On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom):
%26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot;
Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding:
%26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot;
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
%26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot;
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine:
%26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot;
On Nytol Sleep Aid:
%26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot;
On most brands of Christmas lights:
%26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot;
On a Japanese food processor:
%26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot;
On Sainsbury%26#039;s peanuts:
%26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot;
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
%26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot;
On a child%26#039;s superman costume:
%26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot;
And my absolute favourite
On a Swedish chainsaw:
%26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot;
What do you think? funny?
Great one%26#039;s Tink.!!!
Superman with pantyhose,eat nuts ha ha.!!!
10/10.!!!
xxx
Reply:Thank you my Lady.!!!
xxx Report It
Reply:...funny...
Reply:really gud ones.
Reply:ohhhhhh!! rolmao! so funny! that is histarical! i wish i could think of things like that!! so funny! do you have a comic strip or something?? i will be laughing the rest of the day!
thanx for making a bad day into a good one!
Reply:LOL
10/10
Keep smilin%26#039;.
Reply:You know, you are right. we do live in a frightening world. %26quot;do not stop with hands or genitals%26quot;?!?!?!?!?!?!?! People are sure crazy. Better safe than sorry i guess. But seriously, who is going to stop a chainsaw with their hands, let alone genitals!?!?!?! Anyways, these were a complete riot! I nearly fell off my chair. People can be really clever (and stupid, for that matter).
Reply:Yes I think they are hillarious! You%26#039;d be surprised how stupid people are, and what they try to sue because they haven%26#039;t been warned about! There is some logic in it!
Reply:nice one tink lmao 10/10
Reply:Ha! Ha! Ha! LOL! Not bad!
Reply:LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE!!!!!!
I actually LOL%26#039;d when i read them!
u totally made my day!
xoxoxo
Reply:yah
Reply:I%26#039;ve just cancelled my chainsaw order.
Reply:lol that last one was my fav!!
Reply:Yes they were funny I liked the marks and Spencer one the most.
Reply:Just love these
Sending this and your other one to my mates
Thank you
Reply:...should men be packaged...warning contain nuts handle with caution...handling may create stiffness.... ....
Reply:hmmmm........... they%26#039;re ok i guess
Reply:sounds like good advise
Reply:Must be more vigilant when i go to Netto, what suprises will they have?. They are all good, well done Tink.
Reply:They are pretty funny in a sad, sad sort of way. And I agree with your absolute favorite. I don%26#039;t even want to know why they had to put that on there....
Reply:L O L 10/10
Reply:yes funny i like the last one to just wondered if it was a women or a man who thought them up!
php
The following are all taken from packaging: we live in a frightening world
On a Sears hairdryer:
%26quot;Do not use while sleeping.%26quot;
On a bag of Fritos:
%26quot;You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.%26quot;
On a bar of Dial soap:
%26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot;
On some Swanson frozen dinners:
%26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot;
On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom):
%26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot;
Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding:
%26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot;
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
%26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot;
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine:
%26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot;
On Nytol Sleep Aid:
%26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot;
On most brands of Christmas lights:
%26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot;
On a Japanese food processor:
%26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot;
On Sainsbury%26#039;s peanuts:
%26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot;
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
%26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot;
On a child%26#039;s superman costume:
%26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot;
And my absolute favourite
On a Swedish chainsaw:
%26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot;
What do you think? funny?
Great one%26#039;s Tink.!!!
Superman with pantyhose,eat nuts ha ha.!!!
10/10.!!!
xxx
Reply:Thank you my Lady.!!!
xxx Report It
Reply:...funny...
Reply:really gud ones.
Reply:ohhhhhh!! rolmao! so funny! that is histarical! i wish i could think of things like that!! so funny! do you have a comic strip or something?? i will be laughing the rest of the day!
thanx for making a bad day into a good one!
Reply:LOL
10/10
Keep smilin%26#039;.
Reply:You know, you are right. we do live in a frightening world. %26quot;do not stop with hands or genitals%26quot;?!?!?!?!?!?!?! People are sure crazy. Better safe than sorry i guess. But seriously, who is going to stop a chainsaw with their hands, let alone genitals!?!?!?! Anyways, these were a complete riot! I nearly fell off my chair. People can be really clever (and stupid, for that matter).
Reply:Yes I think they are hillarious! You%26#039;d be surprised how stupid people are, and what they try to sue because they haven%26#039;t been warned about! There is some logic in it!
Reply:nice one tink lmao 10/10
Reply:Ha! Ha! Ha! LOL! Not bad!
Reply:LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE!!!!!!
I actually LOL%26#039;d when i read them!
u totally made my day!
xoxoxo
Reply:yah
Reply:I%26#039;ve just cancelled my chainsaw order.
Reply:lol that last one was my fav!!
Reply:Yes they were funny I liked the marks and Spencer one the most.
Reply:Just love these
Sending this and your other one to my mates
Thank you
Reply:...should men be packaged...warning contain nuts handle with caution...handling may create stiffness.... ....
Reply:hmmmm........... they%26#039;re ok i guess
Reply:sounds like good advise
Reply:Must be more vigilant when i go to Netto, what suprises will they have?. They are all good, well done Tink.
Reply:They are pretty funny in a sad, sad sort of way. And I agree with your absolute favorite. I don%26#039;t even want to know why they had to put that on there....
Reply:L O L 10/10
Reply:yes funny i like the last one to just wondered if it was a women or a man who thought them up!
php
...and with this I close my insanity and call it a day. Stupid Labels (oldie)..........................
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On a Sears%26#039;s hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (That%26#039;s the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos! You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap: %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (and that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot; (but, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion).
On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot;
(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding:
%26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot;
(...and you thought????...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot; (but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time?)
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine:
%26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot;
(and...I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights:
%26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot; (as opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: %26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot; (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury%26#039;s peanuts: %26quot;Warning:
contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
%26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot; (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child%26#039;s superman costume:
%26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot; (I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw:%26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot; (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Now that you%26#039;ve smiled at least once, it%26#039;s your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle)...in other words, send it to everyone. We all need to smile every once in a while.
...and with this I close my insanity and call it a day. Stupid Labels (oldie)..........................
OMG THEY R SO FUNNY. i luv u for posting this up, marry me. but ya they r really funny and they made my day. MWAH
Reply:nice
Reply:I can stop a chain saw with my genitals. Well, maybe just one time.
Reply:I hear you some of the weird things are for the company%26#039;s protection from law suits but some are just from those people off in never never land that get paid the big bucks to think up the dumb stuff for us to read
Reply:i got that joke in a forward essage, but still jus shows how stupid the human race is
Reply:Those are so hilarious. Thanks for the laugh!!
Reply:they are great
thanks
Reply:I liked this one
Reply:great
books title c
On a Sears%26#039;s hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (That%26#039;s the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos! You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap: %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (and that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot; (but, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion).
On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot;
(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding:
%26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot;
(...and you thought????...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot; (but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time?)
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine:
%26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot;
(and...I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights:
%26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot; (as opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: %26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot; (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury%26#039;s peanuts: %26quot;Warning:
contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
%26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot; (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child%26#039;s superman costume:
%26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot; (I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw:%26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot; (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Now that you%26#039;ve smiled at least once, it%26#039;s your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle)...in other words, send it to everyone. We all need to smile every once in a while.
...and with this I close my insanity and call it a day. Stupid Labels (oldie)..........................
OMG THEY R SO FUNNY. i luv u for posting this up, marry me. but ya they r really funny and they made my day. MWAH
Reply:nice
Reply:I can stop a chain saw with my genitals. Well, maybe just one time.
Reply:I hear you some of the weird things are for the company%26#039;s protection from law suits but some are just from those people off in never never land that get paid the big bucks to think up the dumb stuff for us to read
Reply:i got that joke in a forward essage, but still jus shows how stupid the human race is
Reply:Those are so hilarious. Thanks for the laugh!!
Reply:they are great
thanks
Reply:I liked this one
Reply:great
books title c
Actual label instructions on consumer goods?
1. On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.
(and that%26#039;s the only time I have to work on my hair.)
2. On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)
3. On a bar of Dial soap:
%26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot;
(and that would be how???....)
4. On some Swanson frozen dinners:
%26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot;
(but, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion.)
5. On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom):
Don %26#039;t turn upside down.%26quot;
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
6. On Marks %26amp;Spencer Bread Pudding:
%26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot;
(...and you thought????...)
7. On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
%26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot;
(but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time?)
8. On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine:
%26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot;
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get
those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
9. On Nytol Sleep Aid:
%26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot;
(and... I%26#039;m taking this because???...)
10. On most brands of Christmas lights:
%26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot;
(as opposed to... what?)
11. On a Japanese food processor:
%26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot;
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
12. On Sainsbury%26#039;s peanuts:
%26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot;
(talk about a news flash)
13. On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
%26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot;
(Step 3: maybe, uh... fly Delta?)
14. On a child%26#039;s superman costume:
%26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot;
(I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
15. On a Swedish chainsaw:
%26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot;
(Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Actual label instructions on consumer goods?
Cute. Thanks for the laugh. :)
Reply:Oh, Scotia! These were such a scream! More than the Boo Boo instructions on the labels... I just loved your little remarks, they were awesome!!!
Reply:KOOL
Reply:just like bill engvall says we some stupid ppl in this world
Reply:I had read some of these before, but a lot of them I haven%26#039;t. Made me smile. :-)
Auto Loan
(and that%26#039;s the only time I have to work on my hair.)
2. On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)
3. On a bar of Dial soap:
%26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot;
(and that would be how???....)
4. On some Swanson frozen dinners:
%26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot;
(but, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion.)
5. On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom):
Don %26#039;t turn upside down.%26quot;
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
6. On Marks %26amp;Spencer Bread Pudding:
%26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot;
(...and you thought????...)
7. On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
%26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot;
(but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time?)
8. On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine:
%26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot;
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get
those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
9. On Nytol Sleep Aid:
%26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot;
(and... I%26#039;m taking this because???...)
10. On most brands of Christmas lights:
%26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot;
(as opposed to... what?)
11. On a Japanese food processor:
%26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot;
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
12. On Sainsbury%26#039;s peanuts:
%26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot;
(talk about a news flash)
13. On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
%26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot;
(Step 3: maybe, uh... fly Delta?)
14. On a child%26#039;s superman costume:
%26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot;
(I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
15. On a Swedish chainsaw:
%26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot;
(Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Actual label instructions on consumer goods?
Cute. Thanks for the laugh. :)
Reply:Oh, Scotia! These were such a scream! More than the Boo Boo instructions on the labels... I just loved your little remarks, they were awesome!!!
Reply:KOOL
Reply:just like bill engvall says we some stupid ppl in this world
Reply:I had read some of these before, but a lot of them I haven%26#039;t. Made me smile. :-)
Auto Loan
Label Instructions......<no kidding>?
In case you need further proof that the human race is doomed because of stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On a Myer hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (darn, and that%26#039;s the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Chips: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Palmolive soap: %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (and that would be how???....)
On some frozen dinners: %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot; (but, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion).
On Nanna%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot; (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding: %26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot;(...and you thought????...)
On packaging for a K-Mart iron: %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot; (but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time?)
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine:%26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot; (and...I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights: %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot;(as opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: %26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot;(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
On Nobby%26#039;s peanuts: %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash!)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: %26quot;Instructions: Open packet,eat nuts.%26quot; (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one: On a child%26#039;s superman costume: %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot;
On a Swedish chainsaw: %26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot; (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Label Instructions......%26lt;no kidding%26gt;?
Too funny! Thanks for the laugh!
Reply:My fav is the last one. %26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot; I can%26#039;t believe they%26#039;d put that on a label!! lol
:-D
Reply:I love the open packet, eat nuts one. Someone must have been eating the package whole somewhere. mmm, cellophane!
Reply:i don%26#039;t blame them after that retarded lady sued McDonalds for not having a caution hot on the coffee when she spilled it on herself this proves how lame we are and just sue for anything but i like the Swedish chainsaw personally lol
Reply:cute
Reply:I%26#039;ve worked in retail..and I know how stupid a lot of people can be!....%26quot;I can%26#039;t find this%26quot;..I can%26#039;t read this%26#039;..(won%26#039;t) %26quot;I need help%26quot;..I can%26#039;t ..I can%26#039;t.. I can%26#039;t!%26quot;%26quot; A lot of stupid people out there!!
Reply:Those are funny, but that last one...ewww!
Reply:i%26#039;ve seen these before
Reply:Wow. Who%26#039;d put that on an instructions card, i mean really.
Reply:Miranda,Miranda,where are you getting these from,so OLD..
Reply:that is really funny. I have heard some of these before, but not all of them. Thanks, that really made me laugh and I needed it.
Reply:lmao
Reply:That is the best one I can%26#039;t stop laughing. That is great.
need to copy it.
book
On a Myer hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (darn, and that%26#039;s the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Chips: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Palmolive soap: %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (and that would be how???....)
On some frozen dinners: %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot; (but, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion).
On Nanna%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot; (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding: %26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot;(...and you thought????...)
On packaging for a K-Mart iron: %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot; (but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time?)
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine:%26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot; (and...I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights: %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot;(as opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: %26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot;(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
On Nobby%26#039;s peanuts: %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash!)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: %26quot;Instructions: Open packet,eat nuts.%26quot; (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one: On a child%26#039;s superman costume: %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot;
On a Swedish chainsaw: %26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot; (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Label Instructions......%26lt;no kidding%26gt;?
Too funny! Thanks for the laugh!
Reply:My fav is the last one. %26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot; I can%26#039;t believe they%26#039;d put that on a label!! lol
:-D
Reply:I love the open packet, eat nuts one. Someone must have been eating the package whole somewhere. mmm, cellophane!
Reply:i don%26#039;t blame them after that retarded lady sued McDonalds for not having a caution hot on the coffee when she spilled it on herself this proves how lame we are and just sue for anything but i like the Swedish chainsaw personally lol
Reply:cute
Reply:I%26#039;ve worked in retail..and I know how stupid a lot of people can be!....%26quot;I can%26#039;t find this%26quot;..I can%26#039;t read this%26#039;..(won%26#039;t) %26quot;I need help%26quot;..I can%26#039;t ..I can%26#039;t.. I can%26#039;t!%26quot;%26quot; A lot of stupid people out there!!
Reply:Those are funny, but that last one...ewww!
Reply:i%26#039;ve seen these before
Reply:Wow. Who%26#039;d put that on an instructions card, i mean really.
Reply:Miranda,Miranda,where are you getting these from,so OLD..
Reply:that is really funny. I have heard some of these before, but not all of them. Thanks, that really made me laugh and I needed it.
Reply:lmao
Reply:That is the best one I can%26#039;t stop laughing. That is great.
need to copy it.
book
In Order Of Stupidity...?
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping. (Darn, and that%26#039;s the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap -- %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (and that would be how???.....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot; (but, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion).
On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot; (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding - %26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot; (...and you thought????....)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot; (but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time)?
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine -- %26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness...%26quot; (and...I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights -- %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot; (as opposed to...what)?
On a Japanese food processor -- %26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot; (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
On Sainsbury%26#039;s peanuts -- %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- %26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot; (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child%26#039;s Superman costume -- %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot; (I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw -- %26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot; (Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
In Order Of Stupidity...?
hahaha omg that was hilarious
thanx for the laugh xD
and here%26#039;s a star
Reply:on a matress: Do NOT attempt to swallow.
:P
Reply:LIke it!!!!!!! :)
Reply:cool
Reply:lol
hilarious
i loved it!!!!
keep it up
Reply:i loveyou this brightened my day!!!!!
Reply:I wish I had seen the last one sooner. Now my husband and I won%26#039;t be able to have any more children....
Reply:OMG LOL! STARRR!!!
Reply:I once got some prescription suppositories from the pharmacy. The label said %26quot;Take orally%26quot;!
True story.
Reply:HAHAhhahah your comments made them even funnier!! Love the Christmas lights and Superman one! Your comments on all of them are hilarious! And I love nana4dakids%26#039;s answer!! haha *starred*
Reply:omg funny I use a chainsaw at work never thought about stopping it like that lmao
thanks for sharing star for you
Reply:LOL!!!!!!!!! This is so true! and very funny! Star worthy joke!
Reply:not all of them were funny so how about u go back on the internet and find some different ones.
p.s. kiss ***
Reply:lol..thats so funny
specially the last 2..they made me laugh hard..
Reply:very good
Reply:Liked the warnings. Loved your comments!
Reply:Haha loved these!
The superman one was great. There was this kid at my primary school who broke his leg attempting to fly - he jumped of a garage that luckily for him wasn%26#039;t very high (he wasn%26#039;t the smartest person i%26#039;ve ever known), i don%26#039;t think he was wearing the costume though so that might be why he didn%26#039;t know about the warning!
Reply:those labels can really come in hand when....oh lets face it, whoever needs to read instructions on a pakcet of nuts has issues...unless they are bored....like i do....WHEN IM BORED.
Reply:Very good!
Adidas
On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping. (Darn, and that%26#039;s the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap -- %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (and that would be how???.....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot; (but, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion).
On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot; (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding - %26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot; (...and you thought????....)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot; (but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time)?
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine -- %26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness...%26quot; (and...I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights -- %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot; (as opposed to...what)?
On a Japanese food processor -- %26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot; (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
On Sainsbury%26#039;s peanuts -- %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- %26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot; (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child%26#039;s Superman costume -- %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot; (I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw -- %26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot; (Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
In Order Of Stupidity...?
hahaha omg that was hilarious
thanx for the laugh xD
and here%26#039;s a star
Reply:on a matress: Do NOT attempt to swallow.
:P
Reply:LIke it!!!!!!! :)
Reply:cool
Reply:lol
hilarious
i loved it!!!!
keep it up
Reply:i loveyou this brightened my day!!!!!
Reply:I wish I had seen the last one sooner. Now my husband and I won%26#039;t be able to have any more children....
Reply:OMG LOL! STARRR!!!
Reply:I once got some prescription suppositories from the pharmacy. The label said %26quot;Take orally%26quot;!
True story.
Reply:HAHAhhahah your comments made them even funnier!! Love the Christmas lights and Superman one! Your comments on all of them are hilarious! And I love nana4dakids%26#039;s answer!! haha *starred*
Reply:omg funny I use a chainsaw at work never thought about stopping it like that lmao
thanks for sharing star for you
Reply:LOL!!!!!!!!! This is so true! and very funny! Star worthy joke!
Reply:not all of them were funny so how about u go back on the internet and find some different ones.
p.s. kiss ***
Reply:lol..thats so funny
specially the last 2..they made me laugh hard..
Reply:very good
Reply:Liked the warnings. Loved your comments!
Reply:Haha loved these!
The superman one was great. There was this kid at my primary school who broke his leg attempting to fly - he jumped of a garage that luckily for him wasn%26#039;t very high (he wasn%26#039;t the smartest person i%26#039;ve ever known), i don%26#039;t think he was wearing the costume though so that might be why he didn%26#039;t know about the warning!
Reply:those labels can really come in hand when....oh lets face it, whoever needs to read instructions on a pakcet of nuts has issues...unless they are bored....like i do....WHEN IM BORED.
Reply:Very good!
Adidas
Funny or Not???
This gave me a chuckle...
and the stuff in parentheses are some of my comments
~On a child%26#039;s superman costume: %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot; (I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
~On Sunsbury%26#039;s peanuts: %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash)
~On most brands of Christmas lights: %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot; (as opposed to...what?)
~On Nytol Sleep Aid: %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot; (and.. .I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
~On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine: %26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
~On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot; (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
~On a bar of Dial soap: %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (as opposed to %26quot;special%26quot; soap???)
dont yall think this is funi? ^_^
Funny or Not???
It%26#039;s funny, but kind of sad that some people these days are so stupid that companies actually have to print warnings like that.
Reply:omg how sad is it that there are stupid enough people in this world that companies have to print stuff like that....... but very funny!
Reply:its okay...
(\ /)
( . .)
c(%26#039;%26#039;)(%26#039;%26#039;)
Reply:hahaha those are funny lol
Reply:I certainly got a laugh out of it.
flower
and the stuff in parentheses are some of my comments
~On a child%26#039;s superman costume: %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot; (I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
~On Sunsbury%26#039;s peanuts: %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash)
~On most brands of Christmas lights: %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot; (as opposed to...what?)
~On Nytol Sleep Aid: %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot; (and.. .I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
~On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine: %26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
~On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot; (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
~On a bar of Dial soap: %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (as opposed to %26quot;special%26quot; soap???)
dont yall think this is funi? ^_^
Funny or Not???
It%26#039;s funny, but kind of sad that some people these days are so stupid that companies actually have to print warnings like that.
Reply:omg how sad is it that there are stupid enough people in this world that companies have to print stuff like that....... but very funny!
Reply:its okay...
(\ /)
( . .)
c(%26#039;%26#039;)(%26#039;%26#039;)
Reply:hahaha those are funny lol
Reply:I certainly got a laugh out of it.
flower
Funny Labels......?
This gave me a chuckle...
and the stuff in parentheses are some of my comments
~On a child%26#039;s superman costume: %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot; (I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
~On Sunsbury%26#039;s peanuts: %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash)
~On most brands of Christmas lights: %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot; (as opposed to...what?)
~On Nytol Sleep Aid: %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot; (and.. .I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
~On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine: %26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
~On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot; (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
~On a bar of Dial soap: %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (as opposed to %26quot;special%26quot; soap???)
dont yall think this is funi? ^_^
Funny Labels......?
lol where did u get all of these?
did u really see them
i luv the first one
Reply:yes funny - amazing to find out how many stupid people are in the world. They should wear signs.
Reply:Wow, it%26#039;s sad when people call up the companies about their own stupidity, that companies have to print warning labels just for them.
Reply:HA HA HA! * FOR U! lol those were really funny!
Reply:haha very cute the stupid things ppl put on things now a days
Reply:like the last two
lol
:) hahaha
Reply:lol very funny
Reply:Very funny! Why are some people so stupid!?
acne scar
and the stuff in parentheses are some of my comments
~On a child%26#039;s superman costume: %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot; (I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
~On Sunsbury%26#039;s peanuts: %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash)
~On most brands of Christmas lights: %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot; (as opposed to...what?)
~On Nytol Sleep Aid: %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot; (and.. .I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
~On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine: %26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
~On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot; (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
~On a bar of Dial soap: %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (as opposed to %26quot;special%26quot; soap???)
dont yall think this is funi? ^_^
Funny Labels......?
lol where did u get all of these?
did u really see them
i luv the first one
Reply:yes funny - amazing to find out how many stupid people are in the world. They should wear signs.
Reply:Wow, it%26#039;s sad when people call up the companies about their own stupidity, that companies have to print warning labels just for them.
Reply:HA HA HA! * FOR U! lol those were really funny!
Reply:haha very cute the stupid things ppl put on things now a days
Reply:like the last two
lol
:) hahaha
Reply:lol very funny
Reply:Very funny! Why are some people so stupid!?
acne scar
No question, but some jokes.....?
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that%26#039;s the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos:! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap: %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (and that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot; (but, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion).
On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot; (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding: %26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot; (...and you thought????...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot; (but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time?)
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine: %26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot; (and.. .I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights: %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot; (as opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: %26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot; (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury%26#039;s peanuts: %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: %26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot; (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child%26#039;s superman costume: %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot; (I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: %26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot; (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Now that you%26#039;ve smiled at least once, it%26#039;s your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle)...in other words, send it to everyone. We all need to smile every once in a while.
No question, but some jokes.....?
ohmygosh, i haven%26#039;t laughed so hard all day, and that%26#039;s not good, cause i just about pissed myself! star for you.
Reply:ya that made me smile
Reply:Lmao, i%26#039;ve seen this so many times before. But it%26#039;s ALWAYS funny. Thanks for the laugh!
Reply:Funny I had a lol
Reply:Those are funny...you%26#039;re right we all need to smile every once in a while...some of those even made me laugh.
I just bought a cordless phone and the instruction manual cautions me to not install telephone wiring during a lightning storm! What am I gonna do? I live in Victor Frankenstein%26#039;s castle...
Reply:haha made me laff!
iv also had-
on a packet of grapes- ingredients 100% grapes (what else would you expect?!)
on a packet of salmon- warning may contain fish (well im glad they told me that 1)
Reply:on this joke i will never the 3 minutes of my life back it took to read this joke
Reply:omg the chainsaw one is hilarious
Reply:omg i havent laughed so hard in a while %26amp; its jus everyday stuff...i hav 2 send this 2 my friend
Reply:lol, i needed a good laugh! thnx!
Reply:the chainsaw is killing me.
Reply:%26quot;Aim away from face%26quot; is always a good one, on anything that dispenses something.
Reply:i like the superman costume and the chainsaw!!!
Reply:FUNNY, I will be sure to share them with others.
Reply:lol
Reply:On RAZOR scooter:
this product moves when used
Reply:That%26#039;s so funny! I%26#039;ve seen this one too!
On a Korean kitchen knife: %26quot;Keep out of children.%26quot; (That%26#039;s news...)
LOL!!!
Oh and a few days ago, I was on an airplane, (Delta too!) and then they gave us a menu. So before the food came, I was like, %26quot; I hope the pizza is warm %26quot;, and my brother pointed to the menu and it said, %26#039; Warm Pizza %26#039; !!!!!!!
ROTFL!!!
Reply:lol
oh i have a good one
verizon cellphone %26quot;do not put phone in micro wave%26quot; (im so tempted though just for 10 seconds plzz)
books title a
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that%26#039;s the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos:! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap: %26quot;Directions: Use like regular soap.%26quot; (and that would be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: %26quot;Serving suggestion: Defrost.%26quot; (but, it%26#039;s %26quot;just%26quot; a suggestion).
On Tesco%26#039;s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): %26quot;Do not turn upside down.%26quot; (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks %26amp; Spencer Bread Pudding: %26quot;Product will be hot after heating.%26quot; (...and you thought????...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: %26quot;Do not iron clothes on body.%26quot; (but wouldn%26#039;t this save me more time?)
On Boot%26#039;s Children Cough Medicine: %26quot;Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.%26quot; (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: %26quot;Warning: May cause drowsiness.%26quot; (and.. .I%26#039;m taking this because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights: %26quot;For indoor or outdoor use only.%26quot; (as opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: %26quot;Not to be used for the other use.%26quot; (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I%26#039;m a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury%26#039;s peanuts: %26quot;Warning: contains nuts.%26quot; (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: %26quot;Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.%26quot; (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child%26#039;s superman costume: %26quot;Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.%26quot; (I don%26#039;t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: %26quot;Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.%26quot; (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Now that you%26#039;ve smiled at least once, it%26#039;s your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle)...in other words, send it to everyone. We all need to smile every once in a while.
No question, but some jokes.....?
ohmygosh, i haven%26#039;t laughed so hard all day, and that%26#039;s not good, cause i just about pissed myself! star for you.
Reply:ya that made me smile
Reply:Lmao, i%26#039;ve seen this so many times before. But it%26#039;s ALWAYS funny. Thanks for the laugh!
Reply:Funny I had a lol
Reply:Those are funny...you%26#039;re right we all need to smile every once in a while...some of those even made me laugh.
I just bought a cordless phone and the instruction manual cautions me to not install telephone wiring during a lightning storm! What am I gonna do? I live in Victor Frankenstein%26#039;s castle...
Reply:haha made me laff!
iv also had-
on a packet of grapes- ingredients 100% grapes (what else would you expect?!)
on a packet of salmon- warning may contain fish (well im glad they told me that 1)
Reply:on this joke i will never the 3 minutes of my life back it took to read this joke
Reply:omg the chainsaw one is hilarious
Reply:omg i havent laughed so hard in a while %26amp; its jus everyday stuff...i hav 2 send this 2 my friend
Reply:lol, i needed a good laugh! thnx!
Reply:the chainsaw is killing me.
Reply:%26quot;Aim away from face%26quot; is always a good one, on anything that dispenses something.
Reply:i like the superman costume and the chainsaw!!!
Reply:FUNNY, I will be sure to share them with others.
Reply:lol
Reply:On RAZOR scooter:
this product moves when used
Reply:That%26#039;s so funny! I%26#039;ve seen this one too!
On a Korean kitchen knife: %26quot;Keep out of children.%26quot; (That%26#039;s news...)
LOL!!!
Oh and a few days ago, I was on an airplane, (Delta too!) and then they gave us a menu. So before the food came, I was like, %26quot; I hope the pizza is warm %26quot;, and my brother pointed to the menu and it said, %26#039; Warm Pizza %26#039; !!!!!!!
ROTFL!!!
Reply:lol
oh i have a good one
verizon cellphone %26quot;do not put phone in micro wave%26quot; (im so tempted though just for 10 seconds plzz)
books title a
Joke - or is it?
A major flood hit on Monday evening .
Epicentre: Hull , England.
News of the disaster was swiftly carried abroad by the town%26#039;s 35,000 racing pigeons, as victims were seen wandering around aimlessly muttering %26quot;fookinhell%26quot; and %26quot;chuffinnorah%26quot;.
The flood decimated the town, causing £30 worth of damage. Several Priceless collections of mementos from the Balearic Isles and the Spanish Costa%26#039;s were damaged beyond repair. Three areas of historical burnt out cars were disturbed.
Many locals were woken well before their Giro arrived. Radio Humberside reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered, still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting had happened in Hull. One resident, 15 year old mother of 3, Tracy Sharon Braithwaite said: %26quot;It was such a shock, my little Chardonnay-Madonna came running into my bedroom crying. The twins, Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm slept through it all. I was still shaking when I was watching Kilroy the next morning%26quot;. Locals were determined not to be bowed, as looting, muggings and car crime carried on as normal.
So far, whilst the British Red Cross has managed to ship 4000 crates of Sunny Delight to the area to relieve the suffering of stricken locals, rescue workers searching through the rubble have found large quantities of personal belongings including, benefit books, jewellery from Elizabeth Duke at Argos, and bone china from Pound-stretcher.
Can You Help?
Please respond generously to our appeal for food and clothing for the victims of this disaster.
Clothing is needed most of all, especially:
· Fila or Burberry baseball caps
· Kappa tracksuit tops (his or hers)
· Shell suits (female)
· White sports socks
· Rockfort boots or any other product sold in Primark
Culturally sensitive food parcels are harder to put together, but your efforts will make a difference.
Microwave meals, tinned baked beans, ice-cream and cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew are ideal.
Please do not give anything that requires peeling.
Remember:
· 22p buys a biro for filling in compensation claims · £2 buys chips, crisps and a blue fizzy drink for a family of 9 · £5 will pay for a packet of B%26amp;H and a lighter to calm a child%26#039;s nerves
Urgently required: Tinned whippet food. Bones for Jack Russells
Please do not send tents for shelter. The sight of such posh housing will cause residents to believe they have been forcebly relocated to Beverley
Joke - or is it?
nice one mate got to keep a sense of humor in these times what i know of hull they will laugh there socks off lol
Reply:super smashing great can now be heard around the streets as hundreds of lucky bullseye winners finally get to use their speedboats
Reply:thats nice dear...
Reply:ok then
Reply:quite different...........
Reply:Hey I liked them.!!!
Some where very funny.!!!
Reply:Hah =]]
Reply:tracy should of been in school not having 3 babies.. shes a baby herself.
Reply:OK. Something similar happened 20 years ago. I remember it gave my kids a laugh for a few minutes.
nanny agency
Epicentre: Hull , England.
News of the disaster was swiftly carried abroad by the town%26#039;s 35,000 racing pigeons, as victims were seen wandering around aimlessly muttering %26quot;fookinhell%26quot; and %26quot;chuffinnorah%26quot;.
The flood decimated the town, causing £30 worth of damage. Several Priceless collections of mementos from the Balearic Isles and the Spanish Costa%26#039;s were damaged beyond repair. Three areas of historical burnt out cars were disturbed.
Many locals were woken well before their Giro arrived. Radio Humberside reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered, still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting had happened in Hull. One resident, 15 year old mother of 3, Tracy Sharon Braithwaite said: %26quot;It was such a shock, my little Chardonnay-Madonna came running into my bedroom crying. The twins, Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm slept through it all. I was still shaking when I was watching Kilroy the next morning%26quot;. Locals were determined not to be bowed, as looting, muggings and car crime carried on as normal.
So far, whilst the British Red Cross has managed to ship 4000 crates of Sunny Delight to the area to relieve the suffering of stricken locals, rescue workers searching through the rubble have found large quantities of personal belongings including, benefit books, jewellery from Elizabeth Duke at Argos, and bone china from Pound-stretcher.
Can You Help?
Please respond generously to our appeal for food and clothing for the victims of this disaster.
Clothing is needed most of all, especially:
· Fila or Burberry baseball caps
· Kappa tracksuit tops (his or hers)
· Shell suits (female)
· White sports socks
· Rockfort boots or any other product sold in Primark
Culturally sensitive food parcels are harder to put together, but your efforts will make a difference.
Microwave meals, tinned baked beans, ice-cream and cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew are ideal.
Please do not give anything that requires peeling.
Remember:
· 22p buys a biro for filling in compensation claims · £2 buys chips, crisps and a blue fizzy drink for a family of 9 · £5 will pay for a packet of B%26amp;H and a lighter to calm a child%26#039;s nerves
Urgently required: Tinned whippet food. Bones for Jack Russells
Please do not send tents for shelter. The sight of such posh housing will cause residents to believe they have been forcebly relocated to Beverley
Joke - or is it?
nice one mate got to keep a sense of humor in these times what i know of hull they will laugh there socks off lol
Reply:super smashing great can now be heard around the streets as hundreds of lucky bullseye winners finally get to use their speedboats
Reply:thats nice dear...
Reply:ok then
Reply:quite different...........
Reply:Hey I liked them.!!!
Some where very funny.!!!
Reply:Hah =]]
Reply:tracy should of been in school not having 3 babies.. shes a baby herself.
Reply:OK. Something similar happened 20 years ago. I remember it gave my kids a laugh for a few minutes.
nanny agency
Anyone out there willing to help save old family homestead? gramma desparate , will sell heirlooms, etc.?
my home has been in my family for almost 80 years,as of 6 days ago I%26#039;ve been here 60 yrs and it%26#039;s the only stable home my 9yr.old grandson has ever known. It%26#039;s going to the highest bidder on 2/7/2007 at 10 a.m. I have some antique pictures , crystal ware, %26#039;home%26#039; cough remedy(c, 1790%26#039;s) ,sepia tapestry(c.1890%26#039;s)a strawberry blond (c.1898) ringlet(suitable for cloning) of hair, military uniform buttons, old coins, 1917 boot camp brochure(postcard style), dinosaur egg, runes, fossils,rock faces, scrimshaw screen, silver platters. Just about anything you can accumulate over lifetimes spanning 3 centuries. I can%26#039;t find boxes for the apple tree Daddy and I used to sit under or the porch we watched thunderstorms from. Nor for the window Momma and I watched deer in the yard as we washed dishes. There aren%26#039;t boxes enough to pack up the echoes of all the boistrious holidays, dinners,birthday parties, cries of our new born babies,children%26#039;s laughter, the sigh of a last drawn breath.PLEASE HELP
Anyone out there willing to help save old family homestead? gramma desparate , will sell heirlooms, etc.?
I can%26#039;t help you but I can remind you. You already are taking the best parts (your memories) with you where ever you go.
Reply:You should be writing for Reader%26#039;s Digest - not Y!A . . .
Hope you find the size boxes you seek for this heart rending project.
acne scar
Anyone out there willing to help save old family homestead? gramma desparate , will sell heirlooms, etc.?
I can%26#039;t help you but I can remind you. You already are taking the best parts (your memories) with you where ever you go.
Reply:You should be writing for Reader%26#039;s Digest - not Y!A . . .
Hope you find the size boxes you seek for this heart rending project.
acne scar
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